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I'm about to mentally collapse and I can't do anything about it because of money.

I'm far past miserable at work to a level I don't have words for. Everytime I am there I am just so mad and so angry that every tiny inconvenience that happens makes me explode. I was putting stock away and the box ripped. Annoying but no big deal usually but today I just went ugh kind of loudly and I was for sure heard because I swore my boss was about to drag me into the back and lecture me. Luckily he just asked if I was alright but I really just wanted to kick the box as hard as I could.

A lot of why I feel this way is because I feel trapped. I can't afford to take a mental health LOA and get 70% of my pay I need the full 100%. I can't take time off because I need money. I can't lessen my hours because again I need money. I can't just quit either because I need money. I don't have a savings and even if I did it wouldn't last long. I also can't find another job no matter how hard I try. Nobody responds back even or if I do get an interview it's crickets. I'm just trapped and have given up at this point. If I get fired someday at least I will be free. If I wind up homeless I won't have bills at least. I'm just done and over everything. It's just too impossible to land a win. Ha and everyone wonders why I do drugs.
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HoeBag · 51-55, F
Once we have been at a certain job for so long, it just wears on us. I mean yeah we are established and glide through the motions but it becomes traumatizing to be there.

I do not know if this is an option but are there temp agencies you could sign up for?
The drawback is that most assignments are unstable due to short-term jobs or lay-offs but it MIGHT be an option.

I do not know your living situation but one good thing, maybe, is if you do not have kids or a nagging spouse.

One thing that is often advised even though it is generally NOT good advice is "get a room mate".
Yeah but then the room mate decides they do not want to work, nor help with finances, and they bring strangers to the house to spend the night.

Sorry I am just rambling.
separatetheheart · 31-35, M
@HoeBag I've been tempted but I just can't take the risk not having a full time sure thing you know? Especially not in this economy and with how tight everything is financially. Not married and no children thankfully so that makes things easier.
Hope it gets better soon, someway/somehow.
YoMomma ·
The drugs don't make you more angry in the long run?
separatetheheart · 31-35, M
@YoMomma They're the only things keeping me calm as it's a downer. Cigarettes too I've definitely been smoking more as a result.
YoMomma ·
Shs00 · 41-45, F
separatetheheart · 31-35, M
@Shs00 So it's a losing situation all the way around.

 
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