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why does society want me to live and want me to not commit suicide even though i'm suffering?

I've had a very hard life abandoned at birth been fighting all my life to stay alive even though i'm dying inside
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I think people don't want others to suicide because it makes them feel bad, like they couldn't/wouldn't/didn't help someone. Yet they won't try to help. Most of the time they can't help anyway.

I wouldn't worry about what society wants from you. I feel similar feelings, but also, this is my life. I'm driving and I'm going my way.

I don't condone suicide because I understand how it feels to be completely hopeless. But it's also a miracle of science that I'm here. There's a lot to learn and understand so I guess I'll do that. I don't know what comes after death but I will know eventually. Why rush it when there's at least some cool shit to do with life.