SO many people find themselves abandoned, WITH their children abandoned also...and it is very sad. The JOYOUS part of that sad experience is when they meet someone in the same situation, and THEN they join together and lift each other back up.

Congratulations to you BOTH for surviving.

"Tough" is a good label for it! We humans know that we can communicate - we do it every day about the least important things. But we most often ignore to talk about the things that hurt us. Why? My guess is that by not 'bringing up' the things that we or others need to change in our relationships, we: 1/ just procrastinate on being responsible; 2/ are afraid of hurting our special-someone's feelings; 3/ we are simply insensitive to our own actions and their effects on other 'special' people.
The funny--sad paradox though is that we can talk to a stranger about these things (like you coming here to tell us) but doing that doesn't resolve the problem(s).
As a solution: Instead of 'hiding', instead of 'ignoring', instead of 'crying on someone else's shoulder', seek out how you can learn to communicate effectively - there are teachers! Your first lesson is to be honest with yourself about what you did, didn't do or want to do.

Glad you got through it and met someone who could relate to you so well.