Psychology of mean commentors

I always wonder what drives a person i have never interacted with, never even seen or heard of, to suddenly post a mean comment on a post.

Like, why? What did they get out of it?

So this morning, I did some quick research on why people post mean comments with no known connections.

Not surprisingly, a study was done and it was found that that majority of random mean commentors are psychotic. (https://www.psypost.org/people-who-post-hateful-comments-online-are-characterized-by-high-levels-of-psychopathy/)

That's fairly scary, to be honest. There's a lot of people suffering from this, if this is the case.

The other, less severe but nonetheless disturbing, reasons are:

Attention seeking: any attention is good attention in their book

Asserting dominance: if you can't control your own life, you can at least make someone else miserable

Inadequacy or insecurity: this is a fixable solution that a good therapist can help you work on

Anonymity: people don't know you, so you have the freedom to be as big of a jerk as you like to help fulfill one of the above parts.

Deindividualism: forgetting that there are actual feeling, thinking, existing humans on the other end who don't deserve the garbage, which leads to

Lack of empathy: they literally cannot even dredge up a modicum of care regarding how their comments could potentially hurt or harm someone. They just dropped "truth". Not their fault someone else can't deal with it. Not their problem, despite the fact they caused a problem that never needed to exist in the first place.

Venting: honestly, venting only creates more anger. Try problem solving instead.

I don't respond to negative comments. I just delete them. I'm sure I'll get to prove that on this one, mostly because these people can't not take the bait.

Luckily, I don't have to care any more than they do by deleting their existance from my post.

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DeWayfarer · 61-69, M

I believe they are discounting political and religious reasons. Which together actually is the majority BTW.

There's an art to dissidence that few wish to acknowledge. Many in both areas knowingly use the technique.

Think of what spy agencies do in war situations. They sow disinformation purposely in enemy territory. Often with insults and bullying.

China is doing this at this moment and it's totally political. Only this is not a war situation. Yet it's not limited to just countries.

People do it all the time.

Ignoring it only encourages the brainwashing in everyone else. Which is a psychological technique by itself and why it happens in the first place!

The only way to stop it is to speak out against it! That breaks up the hypnotic affect and makes people think. It's not done for those that ignore. It's done for everyone else that doesn't. Which is the majority.

This is why ignoring it doesn't work. The disinformation gets spread anyway.

One bad apple CAN spoil most of the whole barrel. Even though a small minority of apples is not affected.

BTW you can only delete on your own posts. And if you don't speak out everywhere else they have won! Their disinformation has been sown.

FoxyQueen · 51-55, FNew

@DeWayfarer It is more than just political, though that is often where you may see it most. As a woman, we often get subjected to more negative comments that have nothing to do with politics. We often hear things about our physical features, our perceived sexual tastes/activites or lack there of, our attitudes, and more.

Women are more policed by men with negative comments than you think. I could even say your comment is policing me, thinking I don't understand the political climate we are in and need educating. (I probably understand it better than you as a person who has been moved to a third class citizen where a gun has more rights than I do now) Also, I know I can't delete posts that aren't mine, which is also treating me like a child by explaining that to me, thinking I don't understand that simple concept.

See, your comment is veiled meanness and full of condescension. You talk down to me without even having ever spoken to me. It is rude and insulting while you believe you are just providing information to some poor, small minded woman who probably still plays with dolls.

Technically, I would delete this comment, but as you said, ignoring it only allows bad behaviors and misinformation to continue.

DeWayfarer · 61-69, M

@FoxyQueen No. And I have yet to be condescending to you.

Look at the pronouns above. Only mentioned "you" once as advice at the bottom.

Aak why are you taking what I said as personal? Are you not being condescending to any that argue?

If you can please see the politics groups you'll see much of what I say is true.

Yet if you ignore it then you are avoiding.

BTW I don't argue outside my comments. Nor will I use bad language or using insulting memes with ANYONE. Nor do I block or mute anyone.

Yet I will defend myself on my own posts and comments.

This has nothing to do with gender of ANY type! I do treat everyone the same. Including the LGBTQ which some are friends.

FoxyQueen · 51-55, FNew

@DeWayfarer Because it is a comment to my post, meaning, you are talking to me, not another person. It is personal. If you want to pontificate on this, create your own post and expand on it.

I'm also expanding on your comment that as a man, you only see a very small amount of comments based on what you interact with. As a woman, you get advice, comments, and opinions, like yours, that were never asked for out of the blue by men who seem to value their own thoughts as if they are extremely important.

Saying "I have LGBTQ+ friends" is the same as a racist saying "I have black friends!" I have numerous LGBTQ+ friends as well. I didn't drag them into this conversation to defend myself with.

It sounds like you need to work on socializing properly on social media, self importance, and how not to deflect yourself onto others.

DeWayfarer · 61-69, M

@FoxyQueen Rarely do I talk to just the OP.

I do recognize that others are reading what I write.

As to you being a woman, I do understand that it is different. In fact I many times show women how to avoid some of the problems they face. Especially regarding PM's.

Personally I don't initiate conversations in PM's with anyone. Yet I know this site like the back of my hand. Because I once was a admin myself. Not on this site.

You might be surprised what type of site. Yet I can tell you would try to use that against me because of your critic of what I already wrote.

You do sound angry to be addressed by men. And that is sad. 😞