I’m sorry, I just have to ask*

*And I realise that not [b]all[/b] new posters do this, but…

When you come to a site as a new person, and you basically introduce yourself by saying something [b]rude[/b], what response are you expecting ?

In a way it’s like coming into a new town and immediately [b]mooning[/b] the residents. What do you see resulting from that ?

One of my favorite posts here about this, from a friend, sums up what we occasionally see (thanks @uncalled4):

[quote]"Why introduce yourself? Ain't nobody got time for that. Just do a psychotic verbal drive by." I mean, these people fling open the door like Kramer on Seinfeld.[/quote]

Then later we see them upset and announcing that they’re leaving, because "nobody’s friendly here."

Just something I’ve been wondering about.

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Steve42 · 56-60, M

Having a different opinion is not rude. People relate to the world differently. A product of their experience. Let people vent.

DarkHeaven ·

@Steve42 different opinions aren’t rude but the way in which a person chooses to state them sure can be. Words matter.

bijouxbroussard · F

@DarkHeaven Sorry, depends on the opinion. Some opinions are rude. And entering a new environment (where there’s a community and you’re a stranger) [b]aggressively[/b] and insultingly [b]is[/b] rude.
I’d think you’d know the difference when you saw it.

DarkHeaven ·

@bijouxbroussard I sure do! 😊

bijouxbroussard · F

@DarkHeaven Sorry, that was meant for the other poster. I know [b]you[/b] know what I’m saying. 🤗

DarkHeaven ·

@bijouxbroussard yup. 🖤🤗

Steve42 · 56-60, M

@bijouxbroussard I Joined ep when it was at some like 300k experiences, 20+ years ago? Been here since ep closed. When I joined ep it was the year I lost my wife, my family and my home. I was a mess to be sure. Getting involved with someone here was a mistake. THey were married with no intention of leaving their partner at the time. I should have known better. It didn't help. If I have somehow offended your personal hang-ups, I apologize. Sincerely. Certainly not new to ep or here.

bijouxbroussard · F

@Steve42 I’m not criticizing you, and I’m really sorry if you’re taking it personally. I’m asking the question of some people who have come in, new, attacking the community itself and then wonder why they’re being blocked and why they’re not having a positive experience here. A new post prompted this, but I’ve seen it happen often before.

There’s [b]huge[/b] difference between venting about one’s own situation vs. coming in and insulting everyone. Btw, I joined EP while still working through having lost my husband and only child in a car accident some years ago. I wasn’t talking about it in rl, so I thought EP would be helpful. It [b]was[/b], but I took time to get to see how things were there, first. And I tried to be respectful as a newcomer. 🥺