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slorollin

41-45, M

United States

Single

Straight

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4976 views · 136 followers · Joined: December 1, 2023

I refuse to argue with people who should've been swallowed

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Cheers to the people who love us, the losers who lost us, and the lucky bastards who get to meet us.

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Just in case any of you need to hear this today:

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• You are not a failure • You are not a waste of space • You are loved • You are wanted • I believe in you • You can do it!!!

An Ode To Happiness

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I draw a hot sorrow bath in my despair room with a misery candle burning. I wash my hair with regret shampoo after cleaning myself with pain soap and I go to sleep when the hue has gone blue and you can't quite grin and bear it. Let this word... See More »

Anthony Bourdain (June 25, 1956 - June 8, 2018) 💔

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What does a computer do to get drunk?

It takes screenshots.

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Good morning ☕ 🚬

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Wanna know the difference between a UFO and a woman driver?

Turn this picture upside-down

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If you think of the unthinkable doesn't that make it thinkable?

Crossing things off my to-do list... I didn't do them, I just don't want them on my list anymore.

May the 4th be with you 😍

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If at first you don't succeed, do it the way your bf/husband told you to do it.

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Poor poor Debbie

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I just cleared put some space in the freezer sounds way more productive than I just polished off another pint of ice cream

The audacity of some people, I swear 🙄

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You're a special kind of nut

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Bbq ribs, scalloped potatoes, baked beans. That is all 🤤🤤

@Lilymoon you can't have any either!

Well this is awkward

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Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door

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I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The Dr said im okay but I feel like ive dyed a little inside.

Did you know 10% of the population has a fear of speed bumps and they never get over it.

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Nope! I can't go to hell! Satan still has a restraining order against me 🕺

Going above and beyond

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Good morning 🌞

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This is just funny 🤣

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It's officially sundress season so if you see my giggle berries mind ya business 🤨

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