I Am My Own Worst Enemy

I wish I could let people come close...the fear is caused by people I cared about leaving

I know what u go through ... Little steps can help, you can start with just one person, maybe the one u really care about and never would want to lose, try to find the situation when u suddenly feel like pushing that person away, maybe you can think about another solution, take your time... Maybe u need to be alone after a while, talk to that person, be completely honest about your feelings, it will help that person to understand you and don't lose her or him. When you feel ready to come near that person again, do it. the more honest you talk with the others the more you won't want to hide yourself and protect yourself. it's a thing of regain trust. :) hope it helps and wish u the best.

I have a few really close friends....but I'm always scared I'll hurt them and that they'll leave me without even saying goodbye.....leaving me behind helpless

So u can't trust your friends completely ... There is a part in you that tells you to be more careful, only talking and opening up your heart to them can help you to take away the fear.. Learning to trust is something that needs time and isn't easy I know.

I trust them...I just don't trust myself

thanks for the advice

Wish u the best, give it a try :) being honest with yourself and others takes a lot of fear away and helps in building up the trust. It's a long road but with working on ourselves we can do it. :)