my biggest fear is losing anyone I care about....but I keep pushing people away, I make it so hard for others to stay that they leave....I make people I care about leave
You are afraid of letting someone near u, cause there is always a risk they could hurt you, right? Maybe there is a trigger, one experience that caused this fear, if u find it u will be able to heal yourself.
Wish u the best, give it a try :) being honest with yourself and others takes a lot of fear away and helps in building up the trust. It's a long road but with working on ourselves we can do it. :)