I used to have a very strong urge to pack up and disappear completely. And I did do that couple of times.

I was very mentally unstable, just not visibly unstable. And incredibly vulnerable. I am glad I don't get that destructive urge anymore. It is almost like looking back to a stranger.

Even suicidal ideation was safer than that in some parts of the world. Death is more merciful than the worst case scenario.

One time I ended up in a very closed community. Not mentioning specifics to not promote bigotry..I was lucky that they liked me enough not to hurt me. They offered me food and shelter. And I started to like them too and enjoy discovering their lives in couple of days even though objectively speaking they aren't trustworthy people. And they belong to the middle ages.

Of course I left because I had responsibilities to tend to and enough sense to understand they are lunatics too.