I am such a lonely person

I see around me how people are connecting again and again and it seems I pass by lives without leaving any trace.. this makes me sad deeply. But I don't have the required energy and courage to be open with people, and not take things personally, not get hurt. So basically my interactions are like this, I am getting hurt and pulling back... to loneliness, my safety zone....

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CrazyMusicLover · 31-35

Same. I really need to work on my self confidence and not get crushed and demotivated by criticism and rejection.

SW-User

@CrazyMusicLover yes 🙌

being · 36-40, F

@CrazyMusicLover yes...🤗 I need to do that too..it wasn't criticism or rejection though for me specifically yesterday, but the energy of three men that I found overwhelming. They came to visit my neighbour at the next hut/little home in nature I live for the moment.
I felt like I wanted some company so I went there to say hi ... and I got so scared and returned back to my hut... .. I lit then a little fire outside, it's like 100meters apart. Later on, they all came to me and sat with me, brought wood so we made a bigger fire, and we had a tea. It was nice.. But it's more complicated than that. It's like, they're the friends of someone else.
All the time I have been living here he's making friends and inviting people, while I am totally alone .. anyways thank you for listening and I am still on this. I'm fighting not to be closed but I become....

CrazyMusicLover · 31-35

@being Oh, if I find someone overwhelming I have to retreat too. But often when I do I feel immense relief when I'm alone. I know that sometimes I blow opportunities this way but I somehow feel in a couple of minutes I would be socially unusable anyway and only risk some embarrassing situations. The worst were college years and how I limited my education and potential professional connections this way.