I've been lonely for years due to my health and talking to an old friend and my mum's like "he might be a r!pist, m"urderer" etc.

I haven't spoken to him since secondary school but I added him because I thought he looked familiar. He said the same to me, and we quickly confirmed we went to the same schools and also live 5 minutes away from one another.

We've played online games, had a lot of good conversations and shared pictures and video.

I was very ill for years, and suffer loneliness and depression due to the lost years. I'm still friends with some of my old friends from 15 years ago but they've largely moved on with their lives, have kids and are busy.

He's kinda flirty, and we've been talking since 20th April daily.

I was feeling depressed earlier and texted him saying I was down, and went into detail when he asked why. He lifted my spirits back up and I feel better. My mum had an argument with me earlier because of this saying I'm showing vulnerability and how when we go out to the cinema possibly next month (meeting in person for the first time, we were gonna go on a walk around the estate but my mum wasn't comfortable) he could take me somewhere to k"ll me, stuff like that, how he could r!pe me, etc and if anything happens to me she'll k"ll herself etc

SatanBurger · 36-40, F

Maybe you can put her mind at easy by going somewhere public. Don't leave your drink unattended and just feel him out and maybe have your mom come pick you up after? I can get feeling lonely and I'm glad he's making you happy. I do wish you the best but maybe it's better just simply going out to eat and hanging out instead.

Also maybe your mom can do a background check. She might just be worried but I know it's annoying.

You should do what you wish at the end of day I assume you're an adult but it is wise just to have a few hang out with him at first, but maybe not to go anywhere private.

boklenholley7 · F

I mean this in the kindest of possible ways, but your mom sounds batshit. Not even saying she doesn't have a foot to stand on.
Yes, this dude could be crazy, but you've been talking for a month. Hopefully you're looking for red flags (does he respect boundaries, etc). But otherwise, meeting in person after talking for 1-2 months daily isn't that crazy. And doing it in public is the safest choice.
Tell someone where you're going, when you plan to return/contact them, and who you're going with (all the info about the dude you can come up with). That's about as safe as you can get meeting randos. I see nothing wrong with that. If you don't check in on time, they know where you were last seen and who you're with. They can call the cops and hopefully you've provided enough info to be found quickly.
Then when you go to meet, just stay in public no matter what he wants. Stay in view of others.

PatientlyWaiting25 · 46-50, F

Personally I wouldn't be telling my mum the details if she's going to freak out. You're smart enough to know how to keep yourself safe if you're meeting someone who you don't know well. Stuff like staying in a public well lit area, tell another friend you're meeting him and have her call you at a specific time to check you're ok and don't go anywhere alone until you have a good feel for what he's like. Trust your instincts.