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I will not make it to old age and I'm slow but surely starting to accept it.

I probably won't even make it to my 40s

Most likely I'll kill myself if by 35 If don't achieve self dependence.

At 32 I still heavily depend on my parents and I feel ashamed of that. This is all caused by mental health issues such as social anxiety, PTSD and regret I feel about past mistakes that will not stop haunting me.

If it weren't for my parents I'd be homeless. I don't want to be homeless ever. Id rather just die.

I'll hold off for a couple more years working with my dad but eventually my time will just come if I don't manage to learn how to survive on my own.

I think by 35 I would have lived long enough. My death won't be as sad as someone dying young in their 20s.
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CrazyMusicLover · 31-35
My cousin is 40 living in his parent's house and he doesn't look like he would have any problem with it. He could very easily live on his own, he just doesn't seem to have any motivation to do so. I have no idea if he struggles with some personal issues that we can't see though.

Still, no reason to kill oneself. What for? How does that help anyone?