Owning my past mistakes

At some point last year, I went along with things that I didn't believe/wasn't interested in just to be accepted. The same people whose acceptance I craved still rejected me. I have been deconstructing and getting rid of all the fakeness, but still lie to myself occasionally that I'm into some things that I'm not, just to "save face". Deep down, I know I'm only holding on to those things so that I won't look stupid- I feel ashamed that I have to eat my words. I'm worrying too much about the ridicule that follows with changing my opinions back to who I truly am.

I know I'm being pretty vague but it's for a reason.

Anyway, have you ever faced/done this before? How do you own up and get past that shame?

Top | Newest First | Oldest First

SW-User

Idk, it's hard for me to relate because I'm eager and happy to choose my own path, even when people disagree. I didn't and don't always know what is "best" for me but I at least always try to find out for myself.

I genuinely think it's easier for women to be themselves in some ways though. People are always talking about how women feel the need to be accepted because they want to be as appealing as possible and to as many people as possible, but in the context of group relations I think men have more peer pressure and less ability to say "no."

View 5 more replies »

SW-User

@Caraxes wow 🙊

Drugs aren't my thing lol

Caraxes · 41-45, M

@SW-User good. They are not big or clever and have fucked with my head somewhat. Haven’t taken them in while though. Hopefully no more

SW-User

@Caraxes I hope you don't take them again ❤️

Caraxes · 41-45, M

Maybe not quite the same but I have a friendship group that I have no interest in being in anymore, I’m the main they don’t have the values I have. There is a group of 6 of us and a few in the group think we are still in our teens ( we are all over 40) I’m too scared to step away from them. I feel there are a few of the boys feel like me and want away from this toxic relationship. I’ve held back opinions and beliefs because I’ve been concerned how I will look in from of them 🤔

SW-User

Yeah i can relate, that save face mentality is something i grew up with so i have to remind myself everyday; i admire Westerners bc their culture doesn't focus on this mentality and they live life on their terms like even ppl with no schooling working minimum wage have such high self esteem

scrood · 31-35

Once or twice.

Add a comment...