Most people don't seem to care unless it's happening to them
They say that's so unfair and wrong for this lawsuit to be filed against me. Then they say something like "you are strong". This isn't about being "strong". This is about not having the education and experience that an attorney has. I know I'm an adult and it's my responsibility to fight for myself, but couldn't someone from my family help at least a little. They could even ask me to let them know if there is something they can do that would help me.
The only reason this lawsuit has been filed against me is because I stood up to my sister's demands for the first time in my life. When I stood firm on my boundary she started dragging out the poor choices I'd made in the past trying to make feel guilty about it and like I owed our mother more money than what she had loaned to me in the past. It gets confusing but she kept pushing the guilt and shaming on me and I finally went off on her and told her the reason why I made so many bad decisions in the past was because I was trying to get through life with patterns, thinking distortions, and poor coping mechanisms that came out as a result of being sexually abused by my sister before I was even in preschool while she was a teenager. (I only made this connection between my past and the abuse this year with the help of a therapist I've been with for the last two years and with over 140 hours of therapy.)
Then my sister sent me a bill and when I refused to pay it she hired an attorney and filed the lawsuit against me. I paid my mother what I owed her. I don't have to pay her for being a mother to me and it was my sister that our mom had actually requested a loan from because my sister has the money from her successful businesses. My sister decided she shouldn't be the only one to give our mother money just because she made the right choices in life and as a result makes more money than the rest of us. She don't seem to understand that I have vehicle repossessions, a vehicle that barely runs, upside down auto loan, garnishments, court fine, medical bills, etc.
I never realized how toxic my relationship was with her until all this. I disclosed the abuse when I was younger , but it quickly got swept under the rug. I learned from that along with being intimidated into opposing my sister in any way would have consequences that we have to get along and I have to like her. So I liked her. I looked up to her. I thought she is so smart, amazing, successful, and I was so grateful for all the things she helped me out with over the years. Then I stand up to her and get billed for those generous things she helped me with or paid for me. Then she turns it into a lawsuit. I'm not a lawyer and they are breaking so many laws but unless I bring it to the courts attention they get away with it.
I just wish my family could help me defend myself against this instead of just saying "You are strong".
The only reason this lawsuit has been filed against me is because I stood up to my sister's demands for the first time in my life. When I stood firm on my boundary she started dragging out the poor choices I'd made in the past trying to make feel guilty about it and like I owed our mother more money than what she had loaned to me in the past. It gets confusing but she kept pushing the guilt and shaming on me and I finally went off on her and told her the reason why I made so many bad decisions in the past was because I was trying to get through life with patterns, thinking distortions, and poor coping mechanisms that came out as a result of being sexually abused by my sister before I was even in preschool while she was a teenager. (I only made this connection between my past and the abuse this year with the help of a therapist I've been with for the last two years and with over 140 hours of therapy.)
Then my sister sent me a bill and when I refused to pay it she hired an attorney and filed the lawsuit against me. I paid my mother what I owed her. I don't have to pay her for being a mother to me and it was my sister that our mom had actually requested a loan from because my sister has the money from her successful businesses. My sister decided she shouldn't be the only one to give our mother money just because she made the right choices in life and as a result makes more money than the rest of us. She don't seem to understand that I have vehicle repossessions, a vehicle that barely runs, upside down auto loan, garnishments, court fine, medical bills, etc.
I never realized how toxic my relationship was with her until all this. I disclosed the abuse when I was younger , but it quickly got swept under the rug. I learned from that along with being intimidated into opposing my sister in any way would have consequences that we have to get along and I have to like her. So I liked her. I looked up to her. I thought she is so smart, amazing, successful, and I was so grateful for all the things she helped me out with over the years. Then I stand up to her and get billed for those generous things she helped me with or paid for me. Then she turns it into a lawsuit. I'm not a lawyer and they are breaking so many laws but unless I bring it to the courts attention they get away with it.
I just wish my family could help me defend myself against this instead of just saying "You are strong".
