Fantastic post. Until you've been there you can't understand the inner turmoil between wanting that instant release and knowing the guilt that will follow. I am 44 and have self harmed most of my adult life. Then I got clean. It's only been a year or so but when the emotions become overwhelming it's still too tempting to reach for the blade. Even knowing it will hurt those around me if they find out isn't always enough. Thank you so much for sharing your story.