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@Melpomene
Maybe you missed the "yep" at the start of my answer. There's no question that everybody needs at least some time alone.
But individuals vary widely in how much time they need. Introverts need a great deal; extroverts need very little.
Cultural or familial factors affect it too, for instance, someone who has grown up in crowded conditions can feel unbearable alone if left alone.
Maybe you missed the "yep" at the start of my answer. There's no question that everybody needs at least some time alone.
But individuals vary widely in how much time they need. Introverts need a great deal; extroverts need very little.
Cultural or familial factors affect it too, for instance, someone who has grown up in crowded conditions can feel unbearable alone if left alone.
@Melpomene Yep. It is indeed absolutely normal, but the degree of need varies greatly.
If you have any doubts, here are a few articles by experts which discuss different aspects of the needs involved in time alone versus feeling lonely.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/high-octane-women/201201/6-reasons-you-should-spend-more-time-alone?collection
https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/living-single/201912/why-you-want-be-alone-and-why-matters
https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/in-flux/201410/the-importance-being-alone
If you have any doubts, here are a few articles by experts which discuss different aspects of the needs involved in time alone versus feeling lonely.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/high-octane-women/201201/6-reasons-you-should-spend-more-time-alone?collection
https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/living-single/201912/why-you-want-be-alone-and-why-matters
https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/in-flux/201410/the-importance-being-alone
@Melpomene No harm in waiting for the right moment (not pressed for time and no one else around) to suggest sharing a cup of coffee or tea, and just ask the questions straight out,
"Do you feel you need more time alone? In general, how much time alone do you like to have? If you're experiencing stress over something, do you sometimes need more? Is there a favourite time of day when it's most important to you?"
Or if they are an extrovert you could ask, "Do you feel refreshed and energised by spending time with friends?"
If they ask why you're asking, you can share what you've seen, heard or sensed, and what set you wondering. You could also share how you feel about time alone, how it benefits you, and how things can get stressful if you can't get it regularly.
Once the flatmate seems to understand, you could make a request for a certain time of day when you'd prefer to be alone.
"Do you feel you need more time alone? In general, how much time alone do you like to have? If you're experiencing stress over something, do you sometimes need more? Is there a favourite time of day when it's most important to you?"
Or if they are an extrovert you could ask, "Do you feel refreshed and energised by spending time with friends?"
If they ask why you're asking, you can share what you've seen, heard or sensed, and what set you wondering. You could also share how you feel about time alone, how it benefits you, and how things can get stressful if you can't get it regularly.
Once the flatmate seems to understand, you could make a request for a certain time of day when you'd prefer to be alone.