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Is it bad that I am scared of men?

rationally i know its unreasonable. i really do.
greenmountaingal · 70-79, F
It's not unreasonable. Most violent crimes are committed by men and, statistically, your age group is often victimized.

However, obviously, most men do not commit violent crimes and in fact most men feel protective toward women not predatory. Your problem is knowing when someone you meet (man or woman) is dangerous. Although there may be no perfect way to do this, it is possible to be alert and fairly accurate in assessing danger. Most of the time, you CAN know when you are dealing with a bad person.

Please do yourself a favor and read the book that explains this clearly. This book is a very interesting and enlightening read and it can save your life. It focuses on knowing the difference between foolish useless anxieties and the things we should be afraid of and how to know the difference.

[i]The Gift of Fear [/i]
by Gavin DeBecker
He visited a company out east here where I was a manager...We helped him provide high end quality services to his clients in California and other areas as well, but that's all I can say for confidentiality reasons....@greenmountaingal
greenmountaingal · 70-79, F
@NiightOwl Very cool! Arriba!
@greenmountaingal yes it was :)
SW-User
It's rational to be scared of a lot of them, but not all of them. The hard part is working out who.
lostandalone · 22-25, F
@SW-User yeah
Irrational fear is never good. Beating yourself up about it isn't good either though.
lostandalone · 22-25, F
@MistyCee thanks
Fernie · F
A young woman your age...ALL women actually but esp you...need to be cautious of men. Too many are predators and quite charming. A little caution is good.
I think it only makes sense... because it's usually women who are victims of men, especially by assault, rape,... It's like they just can't keep their hands home! grrr... I don't know what you have experienced with men before in your life that also may have triggered this fear, but, there are also good men out there (SOMEWHERE.....) .. Oh, i'm going to get tons of comments to this one from men most likely, haha... I mean, you need to gain your trust again into men, but as I'm also a woman, I never blindly trust any man, or any person in general. Always listen to your gut feeling. And study on google about narcissistic abuse, because when women are dating men, some men can behave like, wow, what a gentleman, what a dream! But then they turn out to be extremely selfish and abusive... and believe me, I've had experiences with narcissism, so,... It's always good to know the "red flags" anyway. I only hope this helps and didn't make you feel even MORE scared of men now.... :/
BearDownChicago · 41-45, M
Nothing wrong with it especially not knowing your past
lostandalone · 22-25, F
@BearDownChicago thanks. its complicated and messy.
daisymay · 51-55, T
I don't think it's unreasonable at all. Men have been emboldened to be as rape-y as they wanna be.
daisymay · 51-55, T
@VampireVytra Yes, and you whined about how unfair it is for men to be accused of raping people. What's wrong with you?
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daisymay · 51-55, T
@VampireVytra That's the second time you've used a personal attack (i.e. lost the argument).

I get it. You don't view the promotion of kiddie diddlers and sexual assaulters to positions of power as long as it's the political ideology you prefer. Bye now!
xixgun · M
Any more? No. Not at all.
Most men are good, and kind; but the few who aren't, are fucking animals and should be shot on sight.
SW-User
I used to be too...
lostandalone · 22-25, F
@SW-User is it every possible for the fear to go away?
SW-User
I'm not sure. Every person's experience is different.
lostandalone · 22-25, F
@SW-User ok.
SW-User
It's very rational, actually.
carsonfry · 22-25, M
You should not be scared of us. Most of us just would want to make you happy and do whatever it would take to make you happy.

But a small few of us are selfish, and ruin it for the rest of us.
Fernie · F
@carsonfry a NOT SO SMALL amount of men are dangerous
carsonfry · 22-25, M
@Fernie I doubt your position, but you are entitled to your thoughts and the expression of your experiences. For this man and most I know around me, they are not bad guys.
Fernie · F
@carsonfry It is so annoying when people get defensive and feel it necessary to inform me that I am "entitled to my opinion and my thoughts" DUH! I am acutely aware of that. Of course you have NO clue the percentage of women who have been raped,(you even rape each other) beaten, murdered because she wanted a divorce or to break up...I could go on and on and on. No one here said ALL men are this way but every damn day and night it happens to us and if you tell me that "women do it too" I shall vomit! That is where males ALWAYS go after I say what I just said...you are male .. nor have you been on the receiving end of their heinous behavior...well. I hope you haven't...you might have been an altar boy
It's good to be cautious I guess but you still need to interact with the male population over time out in the real world. Just don't interact beyond the usual hello or basic conversation, whether at work, school, other places etc.
iQuit · F
🤔 I wonder why?
chaoticdreams · 46-50, M
Men are evil, cruel, selfish creatures. We want nothing more than to devour female souls and make them do unspeakable deeds to quench our insatiably naughty appetites.

Thank you for noticing ;)
Men are half the population. Some are scary, but most are not.
Fernie · F
@JustLikeGreta but the ones that are...a HUGE percentage of them are in the hunt for young women her age. She is right to be cautious and a little scared
@Fernie 👍
Exactly! @JustLikeGreta
BondGirl84 · 36-40, F
Why u scared of them?
BondGirl84 · 36-40, F
@lostandalone we've all been there honey... no need to be scared of the rest of them...
lostandalone · 22-25, F
@BondGirl84 a lot easier said than done
BondGirl84 · 36-40, F
@lostandalone no... not really... I got hurt a lot... I pulled through... so did a lot if ppl I know... u'll learn in time...
Sarabee · 41-45
It is completely normal here take this drug it will leave you craving men in no time😉🌹
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SW-User
Yes, but fear is essential.
Nah your just a muffin lover
BrattyMel · 31-35, F
No its not bad.
Chaoshead · 22-25, M
Scary stuff.
Goralski · 51-55, M
As you should b
lostandalone · 22-25, F
@TexasOutlawTrey Ive just had some bad experiences
uncalled4 · 56-60, M
You have every right to be trepidacious.

 
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