How to deal with uncooperative employees who are dismissive of your authority because of your age?

I’m 24 and a bar/club manager and there’s a few older employees here who don’t take me seriously and refuse to listen to me because they think I’m just dumb because of my age. Or they make fun of the fact that I went to college and assume that I think I’m better than them because of it. I try to be a really nice and supportive boss and I’m rather assertive but it keeps failing. I don’t want to fire them as they are really good at what they do.

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approachingmyexpirationdate · 61-69, M

you're in a tough situation but

if they aren't following instructions you ask them why

if they have a valid reason then hey - you're wrong and you can learn from their experience

but if they are clearing in the wrong you get them in a private setting and tell them that you want to be clear

1) you are their supervisor like it or not
2) you are in charge
3) you set the rules and
4) you have a three strike rule - three strikes and you're gone
5) you're not their friend but you want to be friendly

tell the the slate is clear as of this moment but you want to be clear that you're serious

your boss wants people that are on board with him and you need people on board with you.

you WILL have to fire somebody one day - when that day comes make sure your boss is going to back you up.

do it quickly like pulling off a bandaid

truth be told firing someone will make you look like a bitch to some and like a champ to people that thought it was a long time coming

but you're going to look like a supervisor to the people that remain.

it might change the dynamics. you don't have to talk trash about the person you fired - but if it comes up you can make it clear that firing someone is the WORST part of your job and it would be totally fine if you NEVER had to do it again - but sometimes for the good of the company it has to be done.

(I never want to be a supervisor again by the way)

rckt148 · 61-69, M

@approachingmyexpirationdate I keep hearing fire them repeated ,
many times its a matter of just earning respect
I have been in charge of men way older then I was since I was 17 .
I was Master at Arms for a bit ,it was an E6 job ,but at the time I was only E3 ,but I was left in charge and the only one over me then was the EX or the old Man ,
So many E3's -E5's were placed temporary duty under me until a position opened for them .
I was young and cocky and my favorite thing to say was I work directly for the XO
if you don't like the way I run the station duties ,take it up with him .
I had the Gate Guards ,Base roving security ,Fire ,Gunners Mate and the Galley and Quarters all under me ,,a 17 yr old kid
But the E6 who left me in charge personally trained me and I did every crappy job on the base and I was a mess cook washing pots and pans more than once
I was a gate guard on the 11-7 shift many times ..
But I was assaulted on duty ,and the guy who assaulted me almost killed me .
He literally kicked my face with steal toes boots till he kicked my nose off my face and scalped me ,pilling all my scalp and hair on top of my skull like a pushed back carpet .

I refused to tell the XO who did this to me ,I kept saying over and over I was going to handle it myself ,so I made him mad and he put me on report too for not calling base security to handle it ,,he said my walking into my office was an invitation for a "Breach of peace ",,I was actually fined and demoted for not cooperating ,and removed from my killer job .

It was shown that the E6 should have been replaced right away ,but up until this instance ,I don't the job very well and had earned the respect of people who worked for me ..

So they transfer me to the Search and Rescue team ,,,
And here are all the guys I had scrubbing toilets ,and washing pots and pans ,standing guard duty ,and now I am in their world ,I am the scum at the bottom of the ocean ,so low there is no totom pole

I scrubbed Bilge ,and fetched parts ,and chipped paint ,and painted ,washed parts ,changed oil (which required pumping it into a 55 gal drum and up a very steep ramp to the waste area by myself ,,and the same with all the water and oil that came out of the Bilge's ,,if there was a shit job ,I got it
But I worked and I worked and I never complained ,
I got my books to be qualified to be on a boat crew .
And I learned every system ,learned every procedure from how to speak on the radio to navigation ,
I took a piece of crap boat and made it into one everyone was proud to run .
And soon I was a boat crewman ,a life saver
And when they come down from Washington to test and drill our station
they asked for a crew to be tested ,,,my shipmates picked me to represent us
And I come home with a 4.0 ,the best you can get
I had earned my place with the men and women of the best SAR station in the World

In my own business when I had guys older than me acting like they had more experience than I have when I first hired them .
I never said this is my company ,do it my way or I'll fire you
I showed them what I can do ,that everything I asked them to do I had done it myself ,,,that I am the boss because I was tested to be there ,I put up the money to get license ,insurance ,to bond us ,and I am the one having to cover their tax and workman's comp and all the legal stuff
But more than all that ,I know my job and every single phase of it and how much time and materials are needed to complete every phase of the job

And then I proved to them I could do the job very well, everything I asked them to do not only could I do it myself ,I was much faster at it then I was asking them to be ,I was paying them for quality ,not speed .
I won their respect not by throwing my weight around
I won their respect by proving I could do the job better than they could and faster ,I was not where I was by buying my way there ,,I earned it
So as I suggested ,,she should prove why she was hired ,,
she is the most qualified person for the job ,then they will respect her