How to overcome an impossibly hard mental block
I am literally going nuts at home with online university and online work. I wanted to find a quiet place in any organization in town and do some volunteering assistance work.
Didn't find one. However, we have a bunch of self-organized communities, more vivid and young, typically run by students. I feel so bad when thinking to come to them..
Don't know why. The youth my age scares me off with their energy and activeness. I regard myself as very task-oriented person, quiet, not that active, and very hard on integration with others. It seems like I am not good enough to join the team, and whatever I will do, it will be not good.
Or I feel bad when have to do the work where decision is not mine, but collective decision.
I used to only listen to myself. When I do work for society, I always feel invisible pressing as if it wasn't my choice but the choice of others. It doesn't let me go, these thoughts like:
“Why do I do the work dictated by the society?”
“You are a weak creature if you listen to them!”
“It’s not your choice to do so, why you don’t follow your point of view?”
Donno, still there should be a way to overcome those separatist thoughts
Didn't find one. However, we have a bunch of self-organized communities, more vivid and young, typically run by students. I feel so bad when thinking to come to them..
Don't know why. The youth my age scares me off with their energy and activeness. I regard myself as very task-oriented person, quiet, not that active, and very hard on integration with others. It seems like I am not good enough to join the team, and whatever I will do, it will be not good.
Or I feel bad when have to do the work where decision is not mine, but collective decision.
I used to only listen to myself. When I do work for society, I always feel invisible pressing as if it wasn't my choice but the choice of others. It doesn't let me go, these thoughts like:
“Why do I do the work dictated by the society?”
“You are a weak creature if you listen to them!”
“It’s not your choice to do so, why you don’t follow your point of view?”
Donno, still there should be a way to overcome those separatist thoughts
22-25