I used the cane and I now wonder if I was right to do so.

I was a teacher from the late 1960s until the late 1980s - a fairly short career as these things go although I was quite successful - spent my last few years as a Head Teacher.

Part of my job was to use corporal punishment. I believed then that I was doing this in the best interests of the children I taught and I'd like to continue to believe that. But I find myself in a world now where we're constantly being told this was bad for children and that worries me immensely. I just can't reconcile it with what I saw as a teacher. I saw it work. I saw it turn children around. I saw it help children. I really do think that's true. But I take psychological and pedagogical research seriously and I can't reconcile it with what I saw myself.

I am honestly horrified at the idea I might have harmed these children.

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bijouxbroussard · F

It was child abuse. Basically, hitting children teaches them that if you’re bigger and stronger you can justify striking someone to make them do what you want. So, of course you get compliance initially—kids are scared and humiliated. When I was a kid, especially in parochial school in the 60s, corporal punishment wasn’t illegal or unusual. But I believe it’s why so many people now have weird fetishes about being beaten or beating others. So clearly it isn’t healthy. I’m grateful that by the time I became a teacher it wasn’t being done at most schools anymore.

patioratio · 70-79, M

@bijouxbroussard The thing is, I didn't just get 'initial compliance'. It did lead to long term positive results in terms of behaviour. It turned a lot of children around and helped turn an entire school around.

I have no doubt about that.

What I wonder about is what negative consequences it may have had at the same time. I'm told it must have, but I can't see it and I've looked.

bijouxbroussard · F

@patioratio With respect, unless you lived with those children daily, in school and out throughout their adolescences and adulthoods, how can you know ? There are things I [b]never[/b] told my parents about my school days and treatment by the nuns, things I saw them do to other children. And incidentally, I was an honor student. It doesn’t mean there wasn’t lasting damage that I had to work through. People who [b]want[/b] to justify beating kids [b]never[/b] see where it’s harmful. 😞

patioratio · 70-79, M

@bijouxbroussard To a great extent, I came quite close to this. I lived in the rather small community where I was Head Teacher. I still do (although most of my pupils moved away at some point - quite a few of their parents are still around). I watched these children grow up, and grow into adulthood even after I left teaching.

And all I've ever had is gratitude. As I said in another comment I certainly can't be absolutely sure that none of my former pupils don't harbour resentment of some sort towards me over this, but I've never had anybody express that - ad I've had many say the opposite. Less than a week ago, I had one of them who was a terror when he was a child, tell me he wished I was still Head at the school his son now attends because the boy is having problems.

bijouxbroussard · F

@patioratio Then [b]why[/b] are you posting this ? If you’re convinced you did the right thing, what is this about ? You’re unlikely to talk anyone out of their negative experiences, and you obviously [b]want[/b] to see it as something positive.
Incidentally, many of the people here who initiate posts about corporal punishment are [b]fetishists[/b], So they generally have different motives for wanting to discuss this topic at length.

patioratio · 70-79, M

@bijouxbroussard I posted it because I have doubts about what I did. I'm not convinced I did the right thing. I'm just also not convinced I did the wrong thing.

Honestly, I'd love somebody to convince me one way or the other.

Yes, part of me would like to see this as something universally positive. Of course I would. I became a teacher because I wanted to help children and that's what I dedicated a lot of my life too. The idea I might have harmed them horrifies me. But I'm open to that possibility even though it's not what I want to believe. To me, intellectual honesty is an important principle in life.

I'm aware of the existence of fetishists. But I don't believe in letting their existence set the terms of arguments or discussion. They shouldn't have that type of power.

bijouxbroussard · F

@patioratio But they do, they’re the majority of posters who introduce this topic.

patioratio · 70-79, M

@bijouxbroussard Then maybe those of us who aren't need to stop yielding the floor to them. If they are the majority of posters on this subject, it seems to me that's not a reason for others not to post - it's a reason for them to do so!

bijouxbroussard · F

@patioratio I understand that you’re new ? You’ll see by the questions you’re subsequently asked and the people who befriend you.

patioratio · 70-79, M

@bijouxbroussard Yes, I am - joined here today on the recommendation of somebody on Quora. Who also warned me of the same thing, but thank you, I will be aware.

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bijouxbroussard · F

@patioratio Look at this poster’s groups, full of S&M themes. So it begins.