How big is too big of an age gap?

Like the older you get the less it matters. Say me whos 31 years old dating someone who is 19. Thats suspicious, questionable especially if you dont know the two involved. But like 10 years down the road, 41 and 29 doesnt seem as big a deal right? But if the genders were reversed, say an older woman and a younger man it seems more innocent and acceptable. My sis is dating a man 10 or 11 years older, no one batted an eye. Im sure there will be some polar opposite opinions on this thread.

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Mardrae · F

I'm probably going to be the minority opinion here, but I personally would never date someone with a big age gap, whether it's older or younger than me. I want someone who I have stuff in common with- someone I can talk to about things happening when we were kids, and fears about the future of getting old, songs and bands we remember, clothing and hair styles, etc. Can't do that with someone a lot younger or older than you. What would you have to talk about? What would you have in common? What on earth would the relationship be besides sex? I was married to a guy 3 years younger than me and he looked much younger and when we were out together, people would ask me if he was my son and I was humiliated and vowed I would never date anyone who wasn't my age and who didn't look their age.

SomeMichGuy · M

@Mardrae So you cannot find common ground with humans of ages even 3 yrs different from yours?

Mardrae · F

@SomeMichGuy you apparently didn't comprehend what I was saying. My ex was 3 years younger than me but he looked a lot younger than me and people thought I was his mom and it embarrassed me and I said I would never date someone who didn't look my age. I don't want to people to think I'm some sugar mama. I have things in common with all ages of people but I would only date someone my own age or within a couple of years so we'd look like a couple and not mom and son. And we'd have more in common.

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Longpatrol · 31-35, M

I feel to big an age gap and you'll struggle to connect. Not to say you won't but ice breaking topics come easier with smaller age gaps.

DHggmu · 31-35, M

It gives weird vibes when one is a teenager for sure. I know a girl who got with a man in his late 30s when she was 16. She met him when she was still in school. Crazy.

Wallflow3r

19 and 31 is too much of an age gap in my opinion but I am not saying a relationship is impossible, it’s just odd to most people.

Retrospection · 70-79, M

When I was 30 I had 2 girlfriends who were 20 (not at the same time unfortunately!)

TheOthetAcc · 36-40, M

Adults do adult things. If it's not illegal, it's none of my business

iamonfire696 · 41-45, F

It’s acceptable when she’s older. Shes 19 and has just barely turned legal. It’s bordering on predatory behaviour. What does a 31 year old man have in common with a 19 year old?

LordShadowfire · M

More than 8 years apart, whatever the age, you have to ask yourself why.

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