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Okay so I was sleeping with my friend last night

This is about to be TMI so pre-warning. Possibly a little triggering to some.

Anyway, earlier this week she said she wanted me to put my thumb in her ass while we had sex. I was like "okay, no problem" 馃槍馃憣

So last night while I was hitting it from the back, I spit on my thumb then slowly pushed it up her ass. After about a minute I heard her whine so I asked if she was okay & she said "yeah I'm fine" but she sounded like she was crying 馃ズ

So I stopped & laid down next to her & told her "you know you can tell me to stop if you want right?" & She said, "yeah but, I was always taught growing up not to tell a man no. Especially when it comes to sexual stuff"

That was honestly sad to me. Because what kind of households are people raised in where they're forced to believe that? That's f*cked up. Anyway, she told me that she normally likes the finger thing but this time was just different because she had a really bad week & she was sensitive. So I just held her & we laid there until she felt better. I told her from now on, I won't do it unless she tells me in the moment that she wants it.
She said she's afraid to say what she wants sexually & I was like, "I know. But honestly I don't get any enjoyment out of it if you don't. I get off on your reactions". She said she's just used to men only worrying about themselves. Which sadly, is waaay too common still.

I just think it's f*cked up how so many women get accustomed to believing that they don't have control or that they can't tell a man no. I totally get why so many women hate on men 馃槖 too many selfish assholes
I literally just said no to the bf and he continued presenting me with a bunch of other options trying to get me to cave in. I fucking hate that shit. "No" does not mean "maybe if you phrase it differently." 馃槕
ChiefWalksWith40oz26-30
@Nadie yeah that's a little pushy. & I know he's probably a good guy overall.. but I wish dudes knew when to dial it back
LordShadowfire46-50, M
@Nadie My dad does that, in literally every aspect of his life. Whenever I say he can't have a particular food because there's too many carbs and it's almost dinner, he starts in with what I call his "bargaining with God" phase. Fortunately, I have the privilege of not knowing whether that is true of the other aspect of his life, because gross.
CopperFox42036-40, F
Totally relatable. And yes, this is why women are fucked up and afraid of men. I鈥檓 so used to men treating me like shit in (and out of) bed I don鈥檛 even want to have sex until I find respect first. It鈥檚 not surprising at all that she was trying to take it. More concerned with your dick inside her, your pleasure, as opposed to her enjoyment or even comfort. Out of the men I鈥檝e slept with, maybe 1 or 2 ever seemed interested in making me feel good.

Thanks for helping her through that. Last guy I told he was hurting me got pissed. A few times after I just let them hurt me. It was something, some touch, some desire, some dick. Ultimately women want pleasure too, but we know how men are and we feel we have to suffer through what he wants to feel anything at all from the encounter.
CopperFox42036-40, F
@ChiefWalksWith40oz that鈥檚 just not how it is unfortunately...

If you try to speak up, men know how to cut you down to nothing. Butt ass naked and vulnerable and he鈥檚 mad cuz you have feelings. It鈥檚 scary. You get used to it because that鈥檚 the only option. Even clothed in public situations you get overpowered.

It sucks.
Cantsayno56-60, M
You鈥檙e a good man
ChiefWalksWith40oz26-30
@Cantsayno thanks man. I'm not great but I try
Cantsayno56-60, M
@ChiefWalksWith40oz same here, but sometimes it just takes a little
OogieBoogieF
Wow.

Im SOOOOoooo impressed.馃

THIS ....this is the type of conversations people should be having !
I wish more people made REAL posts about sex and sexuality ....where we could all input REAL experiences and ideas .

Porn....social expectation....and people sacrificing their sexuality to those expectations....are what fuck up obtaining 'great sex'.

I see so many posts that are TOTAL BULLSHIT, with people backing up others bullshit .....all becuase they dont know, never experienced it, and prefer their ideal illusion to reality .


So well said man....so WELL said .

Humanity needs to stop, slow down, put fucked up impossible ideals aside.....and get into the moment and their partner honestly.

I mean, its between you and your partner....no body else .

Sometimes i wonder how many people let this happen. ... go their WHOLE lives never having mind bending sex, all becuase they were too busy pretending .


Awsome post man .
馃槉馃憤
ChiefWalksWith40oz26-30
@OogieBoogie damn thanks. I honestly thought this post was gonna get some hate at least. But I feel like it was something I wanted to say so I said it 馃し

I mean not everything is perfect, nobody is obligated to pretend anything is.
OogieBoogieF
@ChiefWalksWith40oz yeah, and thats the point too many dont get : feeling [b]any [/b]obligation to pretend is ultimately destructive - it adds nothing except bad feeling from unnecessary sacrafice .

Id post more serious posts about sex, but as a woman i got too many wanna bes thinking its an invitation.

There is too much misinformation out there.

Its was a good post man馃憤
ChiefWalksWith40oz26-30
@OogieBoogie that makes sense that it would be harder for women to post anything about sexual experiences. Of course dudes gotta perv out over it every time 馃檮
Talking about sex doesn't have to be all sexy & fun bs, shit can get real too
LordShadowfire46-50, M
That is fucked up. I want to know if I'm doing something she doesn't like, because then I can find something else she does like. That's the whole point of sex, not just to please the man.
ChiefWalksWith40oz26-30
@LordShadowfire exactly man 馃憣 like if it's not working for the other person, how's it gonna work for you? It's crazy to me that so many dudes really dgaf what their partners really want in the moment
Quimliqer61-69, MVIP
AthenaArenaF
We live in a society where expressions like "sex object" have been normalised, too many men believe that women are just here for their pleasure

She's lucky to have a decent man like you
ChiefWalksWith40oz26-30
@AthenaArena it's sad 馃槙 I wish that shit was different. I mean I like sex but I couldn't treat someone like an object. It's no fun if only one person is enjoying themselves
AthenaArenaF
@ChiefWalksWith40oz I agree. Sadly there's a lot of men in particular who see women as just objects and talk about us that way too
Yeah. It's like that.
ChiefWalksWith40oz26-30
@V00doo it shouldn't be 馃ズ
@ChiefWalksWith40oz It isnt with the right person.
iamonfire69636-40, F
It鈥檚 really sad but society normalizes this behaviour.
ChiefWalksWith40oz26-30
@iamonfire696 that's so weird 馃槖 the baby obviously didn't give a damn about how they looked he was just happy to have attention. & Who the hell takes a 1 year old to Hooters for a birthday? That had to be to satisfy the dad himself, he didn't do that for the baby
iamonfire69636-40, F
@ChiefWalksWith40oz isn鈥檛 it weird.

But see how so many people are making sexualized comments and people are laughing like this is normal. It鈥檚 stuff like that everyday that we see and hear that makes it easy for everyone to normalize the behaviour that a woman鈥檚 place in life is to please a man first.

This is in advertising, it鈥檚 everywhere in our lives. We are just so used to it that we don鈥檛 even notice anymore.
ChiefWalksWith40oz26-30
@iamonfire696 my phone didn't let me open the TikTok but I'll take your word for it. I probably wouldn't wanna read the comments anyway because it would bother me. Weird world we live in for sure
This message was deleted.
ChiefWalksWith40oz26-30
@caccoon aw 馃ズ you don't deserve that. Nobody does. This was honestly the first time for me that anybody has cried during sex & it hurt because that's not the reaction I want. Like my dick literally went soft as soon as I heard her cry so I couldn't continue even if I wanted to
caccoon36-40
@ChiefWalksWith40oz unfortunately you're a rarity. Keep being you 馃挋

 
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