Having an existential crisis really sucks

The past twenty years have flown by. It's all been just surviving and putting out fires. Going through the motions everyday. Now I realize that I'm old, and there are certain things that I will never experience. So many things that I wanted in life that I will never know. Because there just isn't time. All my time is committed to my obligations, to my children, my job, my broken marriage. I was hoping that by this age I wouldn't feel so lost.