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Curious about arranged marriages [I Believe In Traditional Roles Within Marriage]

Do they work? Do u end up in love with the one you marry this way?
Students from India told me that the system works very well and that the way we do it explains our divorce rate. They laughed at our system, mocking what they called "Love Marriages." It is something to think about, for sure. Others from over there (India), claimed it worked better if partners were both wealthy.
@Alfred22 Students from India (and other homogeneous countries) often don’t understand that for such traditions to work, everyone has to be on the same page culturally; how the roles of men and women are defined, what marriage means, whether or not it’s even considered necessary. If people still wanted to live like that in western countries, more would. That fact that so many don’t is due to [b]choice[/b].
SW-User
@Alfred22 Good point
MissyChrissy · 18-21, F
I am sure that they can work well, honey.
Our grandparents often stayed together for many decades although it werent initially love marriages but arranged ones. I think that love is something you have to work on, to care for and it has to grow like a flower. Men need norms and rules, so when I can change my relationships like shirts there is nothing that can grow.
SW-User
It's worked for many people. They develop a stable foundation and work well together as a unit. I don't know about falling in love.
ChampagneOnIce · 51-55, F
I have a friend who is in an arranged marriage. They married shortly after we graduated high school. She was 18; he was 28. They had met a few times, courted a bit with a chaperone, but she didn’t know him at all. They got to know each other after the wedding, and fortunately, for both of them, they fell in love. So, perhaps for some, it can work, but I am very glad my marriage wasn’t arranged like that.
Is your mum planning one for you?
@obedientdaughter kinda yeah
@KimberleyAnne do you know him? Is he nice?
@obedientdaughter no..not yet...
Subsumedpat · 36-40, M
Like un-arranged marriages some work some don't work. It would be interesting to know the statistics though. I don't know if it is true but I once read that those in arranged marriages – or who have had their partner chosen for them by a parent or matchmaker – tend to feel more in love as time grows, whereas those in regular marriages feel less in love over time. That within ten years, the connection felt by those in arranged marriages is said to be around twice as strong. That those who marry for love, on the other hand, tend to be blinded by passion and so overlook these crucial details.

However, I don't remember who wrote it, for all I know it was written by a matchmaker. Seems to work in India though.
Thezehra · 26-30, F
arrange marriage is only good when you get to know a person and you like them. Its a horrible idea to marry someone just because you r being told to so. Do nooooooooooooooooot marry a guy if you dont like him
smiler2012 · 56-60
{@kimberleyanne] 🤫 well i am no expert but this is a mere observation . there are a lot of pros and cons to this on the negatives you may get placed with someone who is completely incompatible to each others needs and desires and that is going to be a disaster for your both . i guess any marriage is something to be worked on for reasons i have already mentioned . it is wrong how others get to choose your destint for you when you are adult to make your own decision on marriage . this is done in certain religions i understand
ozgirl512 · 26-30, F
In a society where they are the norm, yes... It's the belief in the fact it can and should work, make the partners work to make it happen... Mostly lol
Yes they work and the divorce rate is definitely lower. Are you worried that your parents are planning that for you?
@sarahxjayne a bit yeah
DoorBelle · 18-21, F
I have a local friend who is in an arranged marriage. Her husband seems to treat her very well and she seems perfectly happy.
carolinehugz · 46-50, F
It maybe arranged marriages can still fail as much but for pride reasons the couple don't split so it appears to be working.
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joggie · 36-40, M
would you go for a love-marriage or arranged-marriage?
joggie · 36-40, M
well, you can have your own research about the results/outmcomes of Arranged marriages vs. Love marriages
so far, arrange marriages have been more successful than love marriages but you can go with your research, though
how about you? do you intend to go with the arranged marriage or what?
antonioioio · 70-79, M
I lived with my grandmother who had an arranged marriage
She told me, she had only condition that she laide down to her father before she would marry the chosen husband to be
She had to see him drunk before she would make up her mind and I can tell you, she had the most gentlest husband anyone could ever have
Ingwe · F
they can work that is for sure
MoonandStars · 18-21, F
@MoonandStars wow.....how did it japoen then?
MoonandStars · 18-21, F
@KimberleyAnne We had this discussion before I think over messages
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JessiN · 51-55, F
For my little brother it would be the best if we could find a wife. But because he is a little disabled this is not so easy. She would have to be able to take good care of him and look after him.
joggie · 36-40, M
well, yes they do cuz there is something to discover, explore and then get amazed at the wonderful things we come to know about our life partners yea...
FunTimesAreGoodTimes · 56-60, M
I have a friend in India who will have an arranged marriage, when I queried how she felt about, she was quite happy about the prospect
Tonydang · M
I think it used to back in the day I’m not so sure it doe’s anymore people seem to have changed and have unrealistic demands
SW-User
I have friends who they have worked for. I don't see any problems if both people are happy with the arrangement, and no one is forced.
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bert199 · 51-55, M
I’ve heard that they can work. And that they do end up developing web for each other. Yes it is possible.
Convivial · 26-30, F
I think that if you believe the right choice has been made for you then people put in the effort to make it work...
TheTennessean · 26-30, M
I know of a few who would say yes, they definitely can work.
joggie · 36-40, M
If you believe in arrange marriage, i propose you right now
Justforfun65 · 56-60, M
Did you get married in the arranged marriage?
TheMountainMan · 26-30, M
The ones Ive seen seem to work.
Smileforall · 36-40, M
May I ask u something?
SW-User
Mine certainly does.
Smileforall · 36-40, M
It works well
It depends, on a lot of factors. My paternal grandparents’ marriage was arranged, because in those days, that was a tradition in their culture. Obviously, it no longer suits everyone; if it [b]did[/b], they’d still be doing it.
My parents met at college and fell in love, and his parents had a problem with my mother’s intention to have a career and family (like Pop was going to). His father predicted that they wouldn’t last. They married, both had illustrious careers and the four of us.
And this past June, they celebrated their 65th wedding anniversary. 👰🏻‍♀️🤵🏾‍♂️

 
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