I Live In a Sexless Marriage

Today I was turned 34. the only person who did NOT acknowledge my birthday was my husband.

Not surprised at all, and yet I'm still thinking about birthday sex. I have never had birthday sex. My spouse has never done anything nice for me for my birthday. He doesn't believe in celebrating birthdays, unless its someone with a spiritual importance.

Other than that, not happening.

Do others refusers do anything for them at all? acknowledge it at all?

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indyjoe · 56-60, M

My wife does acknowledge my birthday and does get me a gift or two as do I for her. However, I have never in my life had birthday sex...never been offered or given. neither have I ever had sex for any holiday or special occasion (no Christmas, new year's, valentine's, anniversary, etc.). It's a little disappointing (especially if I'd really like it to be a part of the celebration), but I've pretty much gotten used to it and have accepted that not everyone's mindset is geared that way....it's just not something they think about and my wife just happens to be one of them. She's so good to me the rest of the times so I've learned to live with it. Special occasion sex would be nice, as would sex offered to comfort and/or relieve tension and stress....but we can't always have everything we'd like.☺

darktippedrose · 36-40, F

@indyjoe tell me about it. I was told for so many years how all men are like these sex hungry beast dragons. I am wondering where they're all at lol

Mastermadman · 61-69, M

@darktippedrose we are around.

darktippedrose · 36-40, F

@Mastermadman hehe nice to meet you, Mr. Sex Dragon.

Winenot · 51-55, F

@indyjoe Hey Joe, I’ve seen a few posts about you & your wife (Seems like you love and appreciate each other) and may I be nosey and ask why you don’t just ask? I know its nice if our partner just anticipates our needs and gives us what we want but if they don’t, what’s wrong with saying, “ Honey, it would make me really happy if .... ?”

indyjoe · 56-60, M

@Winenot I do and have asked....that is usually the only way it happens, that's the point I've been trying to convey. A lot of the time though it's met with a no and followed with a maybe tomorrow or I'll make it up to you and that rarely happens. I love my wife in so many ways and our relationship is very loving in so many ways, the weakest point is sex but I've learned to accept that and for the most part it's never a major problem or issue. She really does feel bad about not being a more responsive wife to me, and she knows that I would never pressure her or want her to ever feel pressured ( I care for and respect her too much for that).

Winenot · 51-55, F

@indyjoe Oh, I see. So it has more to do with libido. That can be a pain and for woman it can be hard to get out of our own head. Thank you for answering.

indyjoe · 56-60, M

@Winenot Yes it is part about libido, but it may have to do to with trauma when she was young too (she was molested, and then raped at 14).

Winenot · 51-55, F

@indyjoe I’m very sorry to hear that and she’s very lucky to have a husband who is compassionate and understanding.

indyjoe · 56-60, M

@Winenot Thank You🤠

Sens19 · 41-45, M

@darktippedrose youll find them. Lol
Lots here

Collegegirl23 · 26-30, F

@Mastermadman care to talk about it?

Collegegirl23 · 26-30, F

@Sens19 hmmmm

Sens19 · 41-45, M

@Collegegirl23 a good "hmmmm" or a bad "hmmmm" lol