Is marriage a good idea?

100% agree it is not romantic all the time, it is a partnership. I've had many people disagree with me on that. My wife and I are not really romantically engaged with each other, but we are still partners and parents to our daughter. If you dispense with all the unrealistic ideas that life is going to be warm and fuzzy forever marriage is good.

I think that usually a pair bond is the best way for a child to grow up but excluding abusive relationships of course. @clothos:

@JimboSaturn: Agreed, dysfunctional relationships harm the child and provide bad role models: abuse, neglect, drug addictions... so many things can go seriously wrong. Separation or divorce is better for children if it protects them from harm.

@Groofydorkgerdo: I learned my lesson seeing may parents fighting like cats and dogs before splitting. Same happened with next door couple

@Unloved: Me to.mybwife and I are seperated but our fighting is done.Now we are all lovey dovey and cuddly and snuggly until.she move to Arkansas.
So.yeah try and make sure it's real so I say edge into.esch relationshiop' slow and easy and observe EVERYTHING about it and him

@Pineapple: Meaning not good idea.

@ColleenOhara: A pain really

@Unloved: I have been married forever...marriage is work for sure.

@Shadowstep: Bad idea then

@Unloved: well you two can buy rings to show that you two are together, but spending all that money just for a honeymoon and a piece of paper? Nah I'd rather just be committed to her with spending extra money or time

@Unloved: Probably not then. When it's right you will know.

Do we ever really get to know

@Unloved: I believe you will know when the idea of marriage feels right to you. Even that is no guarantee of having a successful long term marriage, of course, but it's a much safer bet than starting out with reservations.

@Ramrod: Marriages keep failing

@Unloved: It is the way society is today,people don't stay together the way they used to.

@PicturesOfABetterTomorrow: that's convenient

@Unloved: In some ways. In other ways it sucks. You date someone and live with them for a year they can leave and take half your assets with them.

@Unloved: Mine did not...but others have.
It really depends on what you want and what you are committed to. You can't make it work when only one is committed to seeing it through.

Do people ever get to know what they really want?

@Unloved: Well 50 % apparently

@Degbeme: once bitten twice shy

@Unloved: So they say.

@Unloved: remove hope from the equation and get to know them very well before getting into a relationship :)

Do people ever really get to know what they truly want.
Marriage is no good idea

@Unloved: they never know everything about each other but enough to know if they can get along and be together and function as a couple

@Discombobulatedbunny: how can it be fantastic then?

@Unloved: The partnership of marriage. The idea of two people coming together to create something bigger than they themselves. Working towards a common goal. being in love and actually giving more than just a fuck about each other. Having someone in your life that you can always depend on no matter what, even if they disagree with you, they are with you.
But people don;t really do this anymore.
The problem is not marriage itself, its the expectations and efforts of those getting married. When someone gets married because their partner is hot, the whole point of marriage is already lost on that person. When you talk to a soon to be bride and she thinks her marriage is going to last two or three years and then she pans to move on, she totally misses the point. When someone gets married because they love the dress and want a big party it makes people facepalm for miles around.

They only create problems for each other.Always on the lookout for some extra fun

Most relationships end up failing. Divorce isn't something I would ever want want to experience.

@Unloved: There are as many reasons to that question than there are planets in our solar system. I do believe that people mistake lust for love. It takes time to get to know someone. And it takes both being honest about who they really are in the beginning. What they want in life etc.

@Unloved: Right, they more often fail because people weren't ready for it. Marriage should happen after like 15 years with someone so you know the feelings won't just go away later.

Fifteen years of dating?

@Unloved: At least.

@JimboSaturn: Risky business.

@PicturesOfABetterTomorrow: execution flops 50 per cent times

@Unloved: No argument there. I think some people get married for all the wrong reasons so it is doomed to fail like any relationship done for the wrong reasons. ie getting married because you had a baby with someone, doing it because you think that is what people are supposed to do etc.

Doesn't make sense...this marriage thing

@theowl: meaning single is good?

for my experience it is.. no one getting hurt. people suck and dont know how to have relationships or how to keep them going.

Well I just know that's the only reason I'd bother marrying someone.

Doesn't work. Reality is something quite different

Marriage is not the only way or necessary a permenant way to find happiness that's for sure.
@Unloved:

@Saints: what other reason is there?

@uncalled4: People in love marry and then split

@Unloved: Been there, lol. Sounds like you already made up your mind anyhow.

My parents split. They were supposedly in love before they married.