What Is Your Dream Girl/Guy Like?

But you seem kind of easy to tolerate.🤔 I'm pretty sure there are many other guys here who should have said that instead.

Even apart from my persistent depressive episodes, I'm really emotionally volatile. It's difficult to keep myself level, and being involved with me just puts a girl in closer proximity to that instability. That can be hard to live with.

@IvanKaramazov: Hmmm...yes,unfortunately,I know what you're talking about. But I mean that even the fact that you think or realise what's "wrong" with you makes you "better" (can't think of the right word right now) than all these people who think they're absolutely perfect and can't see how messed up they really are. And I'm sure girls would like this way more than just being with some ignorant guy.

Oh, sure. I understand what you're saying. But that's really just the tip of the iceberg with me. And even acknowledging that, it's been enough to cause women to break up with me before.

@IvanKaramazov: Yes,I dont really know you so maybe I've just been wrong from the start...I just think that we tend to be really hard on ourselves sometimes and it looks like you're doing it right now.

You may be right. I don't know. I've only ever had three relationships, and each one was radically different from the others. I have little basis for comparison. I could just be seeing things through the lens of my own self-contempt. I am sure of nothing these days. This feels real, the idea that I'm too unstable to make a relationship work, but then all the bad thoughts feel real when you're depressed.

@IvanKaramazov: Yes,exactly. I've been going through the same phase and I know I always tend to blame myself. I guess that's why it was so "easy" to see that you're doing the same thing.

I don't know. I don't like not knowing. I just wish I could be okay again. Relationship or not.

@IvanKaramazov: Yes,I understand!😕