blue collar men have fewer marriage prospects

That was the headline. In the study they found that men with a high school diploma and no job had a harder time finding a wife. So the conclusion most of the commenters came to is that women are gold diggers.

But did it occur to any of these commenters that a lot of blue collar men have very traditional ideas about marriage? In other words, how can Mr. Blue Collar without a college degree or job expect his breadwinner wife to go out, earn the money, and then come home and cook, clean, tend the children, and massage his feet every night?

Maybe these guys would be more marriageable if they were more flexible about how they viewed marriage?

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SW-User

That subset - no diploma and no job - includes a lot of guys that aren't really in the marriage market because they have other problems such as mental illness, homelessness and living in their moms' basements. Also for the younger ones they have technology that for them replaces some of the things that marriage has traditionally provided: a social circle and sexual release.

blindbob · 41-45

yeah, actually, the article pointed out that these men "disappear," meaning that they turn to crime, homelessness, etc because there's no place for them in society. but my point is why does their "place" have to be at the head of the household? instead of being in his mom's basement and angry at the world, why can't he act as a mature and caring partner who cooks, cleans, and looks after his children while his more accomplished partner earns the income?

mysoulsays · 36-40, M

But men do contribute to the chores these days, besides I think it's more about the lifestyle these man can afford..

blindbob · 41-45

not all men do, or they still consider it women's work so they expect a trophy. you'd be surprised how often this issue comes up.

mysoulsays · 36-40, M

Yes all men don't contribute to the chores

Mrsmeta · 46-50, F

Times are changing. The people who adapt tend to do better

katielass · F

Let's not over generalize. My hubby was VP of Finance and Dom. He had very old fashioned ideas about marriage and the role of a wife. And I know many blue collar men who let their wives wear the pants.

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katielass · F

I don't see why not. It still works even though he's deaf, poor health, severely depressed and getting confused. I just wish he could still be an active Dom but he's hung up his belt.

blindbob · 41-45

@katielass: that's fine for you. it just doesn't make a lot of sense to me for the women to come home after a long day of work only to do the cooking, cleaning, etc. while he sits around ordering her about.

katielass · F

@blindbob: Well, I agree. It's not fair. When I was working 12 hour shifts as a nurse my hubby helped me a lot, but he did it because he wanted to. I never had to ask. Who wants help if it's given begrudgingly. There's a way to get what you want and it doesn't start with whining and complaining. Just saying.

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Paschar · 70-79, M

@blindbob: NO Mazel Tov , No Marriage

blindbob · 41-45

@GenuineStephen: if you really want to get married, you can go to City Hall. An expensive wedding is a choice.

Paschar · 70-79, M

@blindbob: City Hall theses days cost like about 10 bucks maybe , expensive ? , Nope

Jackaloftheazuresand · 26-30, M

or maybe it's true, just use the term "status diggers"

katielass · F

Hmmm, that works both ways. I know someone who sticks with the wife, cheating on her right and left, but stays because she has a prestigious position and he, by association, has it as well. If she dumped him, he'd be just like everyone else, a nobody, at least that's how he sees it. He has failed to recognize that we all see him for what he is and are not that impressed. He kind of comes across looking like a kept man. Not a good look.

Jackaloftheazuresand · 26-30, M

Agreed

PrincessVelvet · F

Well of course why would I want to marry a bum? I wouldn't date a guy that doesn't have a job. Unless of course he doesn't work because he's already rich (damnit - no need to point that out as part of the study). Seriously though as a college graduate I prefer to date within my socioeconomic group so I prefer my man to have the same. It's a lifestyle compatibility issue for me. Not taking anything away from them just my preference.

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