Is it normal to enjoy husband leaving for months at a time ?

I just feel like I can breathe be silly, wake up when I feel like it, not constantly being judged and required to do something. There are times when I thought my husband was enjoying something with me but he was judging my every move, reaction, timing. When he leaves for work trips I get so happy that I have to contain my happiness and act a little sad when dropping him off at the airport. He also smothers me when he is here he has no life outside of me. So my days consist of him monitoring what I eat, telling me to be consistent with workouts, I just can’t breathe. I found myself sneaking away to grab chic fil a burgers without him cause he is a strict vegan.