Does every person have an affair at some stage in their life?

Whether it's acceptable or not?

I'm not trying to normalise it but, I feel like every person I know has either been in one knowingly, unknowingly or been the partner of someone having had one.

And this ranges from people in their 20's as far up to my grandmother age, who's in her 80's.

Basically meaning she has stories of men and woman who had affairs whether emotional or physical.

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GLITTER · 36-40, F

I would never do that. I don’t have the capability to be that selfish

Mellowgirl · 31-35, F

@GLITTER I understand.

GLITTER · 36-40, F

@Mellowgirl I have had it happen to me on lots of occasions and I would never hurt someone like that. I’d be honest and say I’m not happy in the relationship. People use it as a cop out and it just makes things worse

Mellowgirl · 31-35, F

@GLITTER I hear you. And I'm sure reading this maybe triggered you. Because as I can understand it is devastating.
What you think and believe you know is broken, the trust shattered.

As I said it wasn't about normalising it but talking about the fact that this seems to happen.

I would love for people to never have to get to that stage.

The various reasons people give. Are what they feel sounds better, but I'd love to know exactly what the cheater was going through not to sympathise but to stamp that shit out.

It's easy to say don't do it or end the relationship but as you and I both know not every situation is the same.

Why couldn't the conversation happen before the mistake.

Does that make sense.

We can't fix everything but in some cases even for someone else, when we discuss it we learn how to recognise the signs.

If I hadn't been here talking to someone of you along the way. I wouldn't have been prepared for the guy I was with when he was jamming a threesome down my throat despite saying no!

I could have given in simply because well, I loved him, and he was saying and doing everything to convince me to do it.
Manipulators do that!
They make everything conditional and I didn't like it.

I'm alone now and yes I get upset when I see other happy couples but I also remember my past and I am yet to meet someone where it just clicks, even when I thought I found that in someone else I was unknowingly their mistress.

It's fucked up!

GLITTER · 36-40, F

@Mellowgirl I’m a Virgo and it’s really hard for me to let go of things like that. My trust is definitely a one time thing and once it’s gone, it’s gonna take a lot of work to get it back again. Sorry you went through such an ordeal, I always just think of how the other person would feel. My damned empathy will be the death of me lol

Mellowgirl · 31-35, F

@GLITTER the same for you, this kind of pain sticks with you.
I know I no longer feel like I did.

As a male friend said to me, some people only make contact because they are bored!

I don't want to be someone's gap filler.

GLITTER · 36-40, F

@Mellowgirl same and I don’t want to have to feel like I’m a bad person for wanting honesty from a relationship. I have far too much self love to allow myself to be that pathetic