Have you ever had a toxic ex?

This is more of a rant than a question because I need to get my anger, frustration and hurt out somehow, and cause I listened to good 4 u by Olivia Rodrigo and the lyrics are very relatable.

A couple of months ago, I started dating this guy. It was great, we got along perfectly. However we started having issues very early on, like the fact that he'd check out other girls, admitted that he missed some parts of his relationship with his ex and he felt like we didn't connect the same way him and her did. He also called me immature constantly cause I'd laugh at things he didn't necessarily laugh at. But, um, honey, you're just as immature as I am.

He made me feel less than enough, and with my already low self esteem, he just pushed it down lower. He made me feel very pressured into doing things as well, and just treated me terribly. Like made comments that upset me and when I get upset, he doesn't take my hurt seriously.

Anyway, we only dated for 2 weeks. Pathetic, I know. Then he found a new girl a few weeks later, and I sent him a message which was supposed to come off as friendly and he told me not to text him like he's single cause she'll get mad. Um, come on??? If I was so worried about you checking out other girls, I would never want to make another girl feel that way. It sucks. I also asked him not to end our friendship just cause he has a girlfriend now, and he said he wouldn't...but guess who I haven't heard from in about 2 weeks now?

I'm over him, I know I am. He hurt me so much. But I miss him. Stupidly. I miss his friendship, and I miss laughing with him. I don't know what to do. He made me feel horrible, but he was there for me when no one else was. But now when I need him most, he's not there. I'm here hurting, at a complete loss, and he hasn't got a care in the world for how much he hurt me.

But good for him, right?! Glad he's happy and I'm here...