The biggest most stressful thing in my life right now is my boyfriend's 11 year old son 😭

I do t think I have ever been this stressed out for this long in my life . I feel like I just let my worst enemy into my home 😭. He is the worst and make things even harder his bad attitude and behavior has been rubbing off on my kids 😭 who are a 3 and 5 year old little girls . I have been so stressed and annoyed for so long now without feeling like I can have a day of happiness. Sometimes I just wish I had a bunch of money so I can disappear and then I feel more upset because I cant believe I am so stressed and sad that I want to leave my kids behind for a little while 😭.

On top of it I feel like I have to constantly be on guard because the kid was accused of humping his friends little sister . The boys both accused each other but I don't believe either of them they both have holes in there stores and I believe they both need exactly what they where doing together.

I just need some positive in my week right now and some stress free days 😔😣😔

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MrPerditus1 · 61-69, M

Not knowing the dynamics of the relationship or how long it's been going on, but his son could be acting out because he doesn't like his mom being "replaced" or wants his parents back together. I only say that because kids around that age really don't get a lot of what's going on between adults all the time, as I'm sure you know. They act out because they are mad or hurt, but it's not always at the right person, for the most part, they might not know as well. Okay, remember, this is just going by a tiny bit of information.

No matter what the reason behind it, he needs to be talked to. If you can approach the subject with his father, your boyfriend, it would be the best. Talk to your bf and explain in more detail, because I have a feeling you already brought this up. Explain to him what it's doing to your daughters and to you. Get him to see it, bring it up every time, nag him if he chooses not to listen. Your bf should be the one taking control of this. If it's in your home, then you have the right to say whatever, it's your home, your rules. If not, then you definitely need to get the dad to do something.

I wouldn't go so far as to give an ultimatum, those don't usually work out well, but if his dad loves you and loves his son, he should work something out. Find out why his acting up, dig into that and get it worked on. That is the root and it needs tending.

Yes, getting away for a while would be nice, letting you get some rest from it all, but as you probably know, it won't solve it, it'll just give you a much needed break. This situation needs to be dealt with or it'll only get worse. I do wish you luck though and hope something I have said might be helpful.

Stray4life · 26-30, F

@MrPerditus1 his mother gave his to his father the day he was born . She tried to have a miscarriage a couple time my boyfriend told me and as soon as he was born she left the hospital. Otherwise he's only seen her a handful of times for an hour or so. H hasn't seen her for a couple years now he forgot her name one time . I know it's hard for his cus she has other kids the two youngest she has still the others she doesn't . And the only other girls his dad has dated or married in one case where mean to him.

I just feel like I have explained to him plenty of times and have tried to have heart to hearts with him but he just chooses to be a menace.

Stray4life · 26-30, F

@MrPerditus1 his dad's ex wife was a bitch I guess .

MrPerditus1 · 61-69, M

@Stray4life She sounds like it. The best I can say is talk to your bf about all this, again if you already have. He really has to take charge and not let his son walk all over you or treat you badly in any way. It's hard being a parent. I remember many times I was the bad guy, I can't count how many times I was told by my son he hated me and so on. But I did what needed to be done and though we are thousands of miles apart, we have a great relationship in his adulthood.

Thank you for putting some clarification to this. I not only think your bf needs to step up and lay down some law, but that slowly the two of you can talk to his son, try to show him you're not like the others and that you want to treat him well. With all that boy has gone through and has seen, it's no wonder he acts that way, but still he should not be allowed to continue.

Not sure about this option, but if there is a way to get him to talk to a professional, it could really help. Just talking to a child therapist can work out things that you and your bf may not know or understand. When you're close to a situation you don't always see all that can be going on where someone outside can and is trained to help guide the child to a better place inside as well as with others. It's good if the parent can sit in sometimes as well. Usually happens later on though. Just some ideas I thought I'd share. But no matter what happens, the dad really needs to take charge, be there for him and place rules that are reinforced to help lend some stability to his sons life.

Again, I only know so much so forgive me if I have said anything that has been or is being done. I don't mean to criticize or put down anything you or your bf have or might be doing. I hope things work out for the best for all of you.