I can't figure out if I like someone or I like the idea of a relationship

idk how to separate the two wants? Like I've been attracted to quite a lot of good looking people recently and I have a hyperactive imagination imagining like future relationships and stuff. But like.. I knew that for those people, cuz I barely knew them and cuz my imagination didn't rly care who it was, it was just me liking the idea of a rls. But then this girl I used to like suddenly tells me she kinda liked me too and im like 😦. I know a lot of things about her and I honestly really care about her because while pursuing her before I really got to know her and we became friends. But like... I got over her and moved on to other people, but aft she told me I've been thinking so much about her I really can't tell if I still have feelings or not lmao.

and also I think she's going through some stuff and I just really really want to give her a hug and comfort her (can't cuz quarantine lolz love it) which means yeah obv I really care about her but lmao

And I've been thinking like... maybe I should just stop wanting a relationship and it'll become clear but that's easier said than done right.

But yeah also, I've been judging myself for wanting a girlfriend so bad like tbh being single comes with a lot of freedom and its fun in its own way esp at parties, and I was thinking like, right now maybe I should just focus on myself and self improvement and stuff instead of thinking about girls.....

yeah I'm quite conflicted lmao

I feel like an idiot too for thinking so much about these kinda things like,I bet most people just go on with their lives without obsessing over things like that :" idk why I get lost on my thoughts so much so often