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Should I walk away from this “Situationship”? (Please read)

I’ve been dealing with a man who I’ve grown to love. We’ve been dealing with eachother for about 7 months so far... since summer (June 2019) and I mean, we do everything together. We go to the movies, dinner, lunch, we talk all night long, all day long, we’ve been intimate, he gives me lots of affection, forehead kisses, you name it. I’m very nurturing and affectionate with him as well. Super supportive of his music career and we talk about everything under the sun. We really bond well together. We walk hand in hand in public, therefore he’s not afraid of PDA, the only thing is, he doesn’t want a relationship but I do. No matter how many times I try to walk away, I’m pulled back in with the guilt trips and gaslighting. He would say things like “you probably want to end things because there’s someone else” or “I’m sorry I can’t give you want you want right now, I’m just not ready” and things of that nature but yet he acts as if he doesn’t understand how he played a major part in me catching these feelings. I even told him I was in love with him and he told me I wasn’t. I said how can you tell me how I feel? I am in love with you. He tells me he’s not ready for me to feel that way about him because he doesn’t want a relationship. He goes on and on about how he “just got out of a toxic relationship (in which he still keeps in touch with the ex) and he also uses his music career as a reason why he’s not ready, yet he wants me everywhere he goes. Also questions me about my inbox on social media and acts jealous if he thinks I’m talking to another guy. It’s confusing! I don’t know what to do. We have so much fun together but when it’s bad, it’s bad. He knows what I want and he knows that he wants to play the field, when I let him know that I know he doesn’t want commitment so that he can play the field he denies it, yet clearly want to appear single since he introduces me as his “friend” when people ask him who I am to him (women in particular). I know it’s pathetic for me to stick around given all this info, but it’s so complicated, because I know he’s emotionally unavailable, I just don’t know how to let go and go cold turkey on someone I’ve had deep feelings for.
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Sapio · 46-50, M
Seems like he is wanting to take advantage of the benefits that come with having a relationship without wanting to enter into or admit to a commitment. You need to walk away. It will only get worse for YOU.
Mrowe718 · 41-45, F
@Sapio thank you. This is exactly what’s happening (even though he denies it every single time). How should I walk away? A mature talk about no longer wanting it? Or just “no contact”?
Sapio · 46-50, M
@Mrowe718 I don't think talking face to face will be effective. And I say that because his guilt tripping and gaslighting has obviously been effective in the past.

That being said I think your options are to write him a letter, one that's straight to the point and brings you closure or text or email, blocking his ability to contact you afterwards.

The idea of a letter I like because it allows you to review your words and express yourself in the most effective manner.
Mrowe718 · 41-45, F
@Sapio I will write and express myself. I hope it works. I know face to face won’t work because as you mentioned, he’s worked his way back before in similar instances where I would try and walk away and he would talk me out of it with fake apologies. It sucks but I have to do it.