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Should I walk away from this “Situationship”? (Please read)

I’ve been dealing with a man who I’ve grown to love. We’ve been dealing with eachother for about 7 months so far... since summer (June 2019) and I mean, we do everything together. We go to the movies, dinner, lunch, we talk all night long, all day long, we’ve been intimate, he gives me lots of affection, forehead kisses, you name it. I’m very nurturing and affectionate with him as well. Super supportive of his music career and we talk about everything under the sun. We really bond well together. We walk hand in hand in public, therefore he’s not afraid of PDA, the only thing is, he doesn’t want a relationship but I do. No matter how many times I try to walk away, I’m pulled back in with the guilt trips and gaslighting. He would say things like “you probably want to end things because there’s someone else” or “I’m sorry I can’t give you want you want right now, I’m just not ready” and things of that nature but yet he acts as if he doesn’t understand how he played a major part in me catching these feelings. I even told him I was in love with him and he told me I wasn’t. I said how can you tell me how I feel? I am in love with you. He tells me he’s not ready for me to feel that way about him because he doesn’t want a relationship. He goes on and on about how he “just got out of a toxic relationship (in which he still keeps in touch with the ex) and he also uses his music career as a reason why he’s not ready, yet he wants me everywhere he goes. Also questions me about my inbox on social media and acts jealous if he thinks I’m talking to another guy. It’s confusing! I don’t know what to do. We have so much fun together but when it’s bad, it’s bad. He knows what I want and he knows that he wants to play the field, when I let him know that I know he doesn’t want commitment so that he can play the field he denies it, yet clearly want to appear single since he introduces me as his “friend” when people ask him who I am to him (women in particular). I know it’s pathetic for me to stick around given all this info, but it’s so complicated, because I know he’s emotionally unavailable, I just don’t know how to let go and go cold turkey on someone I’ve had deep feelings for.
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He should either commit or stay out of relationships. It is no good for you to be kept on a shelf. He is not considering your feelings in his decisions, only his own. He obviously does not feel as deeply for you as you do for him, which amounts to a 1-sided relationship, just like all the ones I have had. It is better to be alone and lonely than to have someone with you who is only using you. Your partner has to invest as much love as you do or it won't last through hardships.
Mrowe718 · 41-45, F
@Anonymartyr I agree, unrequited feelings and love sucks major. He claims he has feelings but I know it’s nowhere near the magnitude in which I feel for him. At the end of the day he’s more concerned with his music career, and appealing to other women so I definitely am not the one for him...
@Mrowe718 I was a lead vocalist for two different bands during the 90s. Going on tour did not mean that I could not have maintained a steady relationship with someone. Some of my band members did not want committed relationships, but that was because they wanted to play around with groupies on the road- but they didn't have someone like you waiting for them when they did it.
Mrowe718 · 41-45, F
@Anonymartyr it’s interesting because he’s a singer and also plays guitar. He tried to bring together a band but I think he’s hard to work with because he wants to be the star of the show. (Attention whore) He’s a wonderful musician and is super talented but he’s extremely caught up on himself , and how people can be a benefit to him (including me).

I think that is definitely his goal (to appeal to groupies) I got a small taste of what it would be like if he really got famous. He invited me to his performance and women were there, flirting with him, him flirting back, he wasted no time telling these women I was his friend, just to give the green light. It really hurt me but in private he told me that he told them we were just friends because it’s the truth, when in all actuality he calls me “his baby” and we do things that “friends” don’t do. I’m sick even thinking about it, because I really care about him and wanted to believe he was capable of a healthy, loving relationship, but he truly isn’t. He’s too caught up in himself and trying to get famous. Totally not for me.
@Mrowe718 That is no good at all. You deserve better than that, just like I deserve better than to be discarded just because I am poor because of being crippled .
Mrowe718 · 41-45, F
@Anonymartyr we both deserve better. I’m praying for better days. Thank you very much for your kind words 🙏
@Mrowe718 let me know if you are ever in/going to Windsor Ontario Canada. I can't travel.