How does one become more grateful towards their partner?

I was emotionally abused by a close friend for many years and it has caused some pretty intense emotional scars. I am now finding it hard to be grateful and loving towards my loving and amazing boyfriend of almost 2 years. I love him so much and he treats me like an absolute princess and is so supportive of everything I do. He knows about my past and everything. But lately I’m having a hard time letting him in and being grateful for everything he does for me and I am feeling so guilty about it. But in the moment my irritation and insecurities take over and I can’t just say thank you. I have to get upset over something. I can’t keep hurting him like this even though he says he’s fine it is straining our relationship. Please if anyone has advice I am all ears.

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REMsleep · 41-45, F Best Comment

Start with 3 areas of improvement that you want to work on with him. Examples would be somethong like gratitude, reciprocity, and special occassions.
So every time that he does something that if he were your mom or a stranger that you would normally feel the need to thank him for, pause and think about what you want to do AND WHY.
Do you want to discourage a good relationship? Do you want to loose him? Think logically. If being a good person to him encourages him to hurt you emotionally wouldn't it be better to know now rather than later? Hasn't he already shown you his character? You must give what you want to receive. Hurt people hurt people and all that. Do not act from a place of emotion. Act based on logic. Emotions will catch up.

islandgirl55 · 26-30, F

@REMsleep Thank you so much. This is the hardcore truth that I needed. Because you are absolutely right, he has already shown me who he is and I need to trust that and act on logic because that is all I have right now that isn't scarred and broken.