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GentleJoe · 61-69, M
Its obvious that he's been seeing your relationship differently than you have. If its not something you want right now, let him know before he assumes otherwise and you find yourself in a possessive relationship that you don't want.
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
I agree and I don’t want to end up unhappy again. Thank you 😊 @GentleJoe
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HoraceGreenley · 56-60, M
Only that from the beginning, he wanted to get into your pants.
HoraceGreenley · 56-60, M
@LisaAnn Well that is this guy's goal. He was playing along until he couldn't wait any longer.
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
I guess he continues to wait. Lol. @HoraceGreenley
HoraceGreenley · 56-60, M
chuck7882 · 61-69, M
Inform him that you are not bf/gf until you say you are
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
Yes thank you. I was hoping I could be part of the conversation on this matter. @chuck7882
You have a say in this, remember.
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
Thank you. I agree. 😊@Kathburglar
76starships · 46-50, M
That seems fast. You need some time to work out the separation/divorce before you jump into another relationship. If he's a good friend who wants to be more, he'll understand.
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
That’s what my thoughts are. I know it has been awhile since I have been dating but I didn’t think things changed that much. @76starships
melbeacher · 56-60, M
Trust me you need time @LisaAnn
unbiased1946 · 70-79, M
Yes babygirl you are missing something....the right to make your OWN CHOICE, if you submit to him. It is your life, and you need to take a couple steps back and decide what direction you want to take.. Get your ducks in a line before you make a bad choice or a choice you are not ready to make. Only YOU, are responsible FOR YOU!!
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
Thank you so much for your wonderful thoughts. You are totally right. 💗@unbiased1946
LookingForIt987 · 51-55, M
I'm a bit late to this party, but...

I see in the comments you effectively stood up to him and told him how things are. And you say things have been OK since then. I would advise you to continue to be careful, however. I fully expect he'll make another move, and his next move very well might be assault if you reject his advances.

Also, don't be shocked if he accuses you of "friend zoning" him. I would actually be shocked if he didn't do that at some point. If he does, there are only two valid choices (and you can give him both):

A. Fuck off

or

B. Maybe I friend zoned you, but you girlfriend zoned me first

Personally, I'd suggest B followed by A. But that's just me; maybe you're not as crass as I am. :)
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
@LookingForIt987 thank you so much for joining in. It is never to late to give others suggestions or ideas. Ty.
MaxtheMentor · 51-55, M
Tell him to wind his neck in. Sounds ominously like he's trying to control, rather than be with?
Take care with him and don't take any crap, not that you would obviously?
SW-User
I think he's got a screw loose somewhere, there are about 20 steps between where you are and where he thinks you are.
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LisaAnn · 51-55, F
You are correct. @Rattlesnake
jennypenny · 70-79, F
An opinion from the gutter@Rattlesnake
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luctoretemergo · 61-69, M
Two words
Restraining Order
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
Lmao. But you may not be wrong. 🤨🤨@luctoretemergo
luctoretemergo · 61-69, M
Just be careful 😊
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Oystercult · 41-45, M
This happening to me right now.... !!
If your hubby is a good man.... dont dump him !...work it out.... !!

But if you've already moved on....you must let your hubby know soon....and be very kind and gentle when u break the news that you are over him !
Hug him...caress him...be nice.... and tell him you'll always be there... !
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MaxtheMentor · 51-55, M
@addicted exactly 🤨
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LisaAnn · 51-55, F
Thank you and yes I agree that caution is best. @PhilK
SW-User
Wtf? Rather manipulative, not cool
Uncfred · 61-69, M
I have read this story twice now, but cant think of any reason why he could assume such a thing. Let him go unless you are dependant on his friendship.
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
Thank you for not seeing what I am not seeing. I can do well without him. @Uncfred
Uncfred · 61-69, M
Power to you honey, you have a life to live.
dont think about what he wants. what do you want are you sure you are ready. If not then tell him you need more time. If he is a good man he will understand and wait. If not he will walk away and you will know
badminton · 61-69, MVIP
Hmmm, I would advise you to proceed with caution. To just announce he is now your boyfriend like that, could mean he is narcissistic and /or possessive. Set boundaries right away with this guy.
navigatorTR · 41-45, M
well you should be feeling what you really are. There is no sex. so you can be so close with your friend, you may like to spend time with him etc. but if you do not feel anything emotional or physical then he is just a friend :)
EnigmaticGeek · 61-69, M
A memo.

Sounds like your "friend" has become rather possessive of you, possibly to the point of delusional.

Be careful for your safety.
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
Thank you for your thoughts. I am being careful. I hope @EnigmaticGeek
EnigmaticGeek · 61-69, M
@LisaAnn You're welcome.

If you ever wish to discuss men and their idiosyncrasies, any other topic, or even just to vent, please feel free to PM me.

I hope things work out well for you re. your "friend". I put "friend" n quotes because it didn't sound like you had given him any reason to think your relationship was anything but platonic.

That raises psychological red flags to me. And no, I'm not a psychologist, but with 3 ex-wives, so far--LOL, I've had enough therapy that I think I should have an honorary degree in psychology from UHK (University of Hard Knocks).
CoolInferno · 31-35, M
Yes.

He has just expressed his side of feeling based on both of ur behaviour...

I think u need to make it clear, that just hanging out with one another doesn't make u bf/gf.
Maturebate · 70-79, M
Communication is essential to any good relationship so he needs to be able to articulate his desires not make assumptions and jump the gun.
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
Yes you are right and he now knows where we stand. ☺️@Maturebate
LarryZ · 56-60, M
How old is he? That sounds kind of high school ish. Plus he is being very aggressive. If that’s not what you want tell him now.
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
Yes I agree with you and I did tell him that I am not interested in anything more than his friendship. He seems to be okay with that. So far. Lol. @LarryZ
LarryZ · 56-60, M
Good luck @LisaAnn
fddlpej · 61-69, M
Well he should never presume for the both of you.
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
lol. He did. @fddlpej
fddlpej · 61-69, M
@LisaAnn he did? Sounds like you have taken care of your problem. Lol
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
So far so good @fddlpej
On the other hand, to be that controlling could be dangerous unless you like that of course
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
Thank you for your thoughts and yes I agree with you, it can be dangerous. So far he has backed off and is being respectful. @Shutup
@LisaAnn so glad to hear that. Hope things work out the way YOU want them to.
496sbc · 36-40, M
well they have to want to be that with u if not. it will never happen at all. which in turn is a shame
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
Yes I agree. Thank you 😊 @496sbc
496sbc · 36-40, M
tour very welcome @LisaAnn
Livingwell · 61-69, M
Total BS. And he's telling you what he’s going to do without your consent. I say run! You don’t need that BS!
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
My thoughts exactly. Thank you for saying it too. @Livingwell
Livingwell · 61-69, M
@LisaAnn 👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼
cd4259 · 61-69, M
You definitely have a say so please don't let him set the rules. Friends ( with or without benefits) just don't make decisions about you or your life.
Roteampelbremser · 61-69
How did things develop with this "friend"? Could you convince him that you are not going to get into a bf/gf constellation?
Keepitsimple · 51-55, F
That’s fine I guess until you get heal emotionally and figure out what you do want which will not be him in the end when you’re stronger.
homespun2 · 70-79, M
when you feel that there is more than just friendship between you.And you want to be with them more than before
RubySoo · 56-60, F
....and this is not what you want from it???
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
No. Not at all. This is all new to me. Lol. @RubySoo
RubySoo · 56-60, F
@LisaAnn then you must tell him...the sooner the better. I hopehes u derstanding and your friendship survives this. You need your pals right now x
lubovont · 70-79, M
@RubySoo I agree
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LisaAnn · 51-55, F
Yes I do know what you mean. Lol. @PDaddy
SW-User
You are missing a lot. This is your time to be free and exploring. Dont let him put u in a cage
jennypenny · 70-79, F
Sounds a pretty risky situation if you are going through a seperation
Mothtoaflame · 56-60, M
He's being desperate and aggressive. Show him the door.
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
Yes I do believe he is coming on to strong. I am not ready for another relationship right now. Time to heal and be there for the kids. Thank you for your thoughts @Mothtoaflame
masterofyou · 70-79, M
No enjoy each other even get naughty I'd he is the right one.. Life is short live it...😉
lubovont · 70-79, M
I hope you can set him straight and remain friends. It's a tricky thing
Callaghen · 61-69, M
seems pretty controlling and one sided on his part .and very abrupt
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I am not sure what he was thinking but I will be talking to him about all this. hope we can still friends when I do. @Callaghen
Uncfred · 61-69, M
His comment alone tells how he is thinking!!!
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
That’s very true. I set the situation right and he has been okay. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. @Uncfred
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PissFun · 70-79, M
Seems like he's jumped the gun a bit! (Thanks for the Friend)
CathyUK · 56-60, F
NO NO NO! Tell him to sling his hook!
BigGuy2 · 26-30, M
... BUT, he might interpret that as a euphemism 😅 @CathyUK
homespun2 · 70-79, M
where are at with this now.
LisaAnn · 51-55, F
Friends and only friends @homespun2
homespun2 · 70-79, M
do you feel the same way....if not .step him back.
likesnatural · 70-79, M
Your permission, consent, and opinion
masterofyou · 70-79, M
I don't know, has it been working out for you???
Killroy59 · 61-69, M
Big time hun , your jumping in to fast
SW-User
Be nice to ask you!!

 
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