Love triangle... in a way

My marriage has already ended long time ago and we are both not doing much on saving it or ending it. But I am not going to talk about my broken marriage. It is about this 2 guys I met online. One guy I've known for 4+ years, he is miserable in his marriage and stays about 9800 miles away. There is no way we could be together, but we were there for each other through our darkest times. About a year ago, I met another guy online (4500 miles away). It started off decent and nice, and then some sort of feelings developed. We met in person about a month ago, and it was the best meet up ever! We had so much fun and he decided to meet again somewhere end of this year. I saw his efforts. He is working extra hard to save money etc. Now the other guy (9800 miles away) is struggling to accept the fact that I am seeing this man. I feel so stuck and guilty now. I am not sure if I should focus on this guy as he was there during my darkest time or with the new guy who is making the effort to be with me. And yes, I am not thinking of my husband since he is the reason I am in this mess.

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indyjoe · 56-60, M

You have no one but yourself to blame for this mess...If your marriage is over then end it which you are not doing (by your own admission). Staying married is not fair to either one of your new love interests, and will also come back to bite you in the ass should your husband seek divorce should you choose to be with either new guy. Once your marriage is dissolved, THEN make your choice....no offense intended, but it may be time to grow up because this all sounds kind of adolescent.

Darkmare · 36-40, F

@indyjoe I totally understand. It is very tricky as the husband doesn't want to let me go (Probably because of the money invested or it is easier to stay like this). Plus, I have some stuff to do before I could proceed with the divorce. We are in a long distance relationship so he is not all the time here. I blame him as he gave me empty promises which led to where I am now. I know how I sound like and being in such situation, I just don't care anymore. 8 years of loneliness with or without him. Anyways, you are right about staying married isn't fair for them...that statement made me think. Thank you, Indyjoe.

indyjoe · 56-60, M

@Darkmare You're welcome...I wasn't trying to judge or criticize, Just shedding some light on how it looks from the outside based on what you wrote. I do understand what you're saying...I just don't want to see you make even bigger mistakes.

Darkmare · 36-40, F

@indyjoe I appreciate that. Have a great day ahead ☺️

indyjoe · 56-60, M

@Darkmare You too😉