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Fishermen65 · 56-60, M
He wants someone to warm his bed on his terms.
Don't get too attached because this sort of guy most likely will never commit. My own experience of such a guy ended when he left me no doubt that he would go as far as to actually hit a woman.
My suggestion to you is to get out before it even reaches the stage where it gets to be anywhere near as abusive as mine was.
Don't get too attached because this sort of guy most likely will never commit. My own experience of such a guy ended when he left me no doubt that he would go as far as to actually hit a woman.
My suggestion to you is to get out before it even reaches the stage where it gets to be anywhere near as abusive as mine was.
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@Prttylttlthng Aggressive??? Really??? I'm outlining exactly how abuse and conditioning works based on almost 20 years of experience - and now i'm being aggressive???
At the end of the day, the choice is yours - I can only hope that you aren't sitting here from my angle 20 years from now having this conversation from my angle.
Peace
At the end of the day, the choice is yours - I can only hope that you aren't sitting here from my angle 20 years from now having this conversation from my angle.
Peace
Prttylttlthng · 41-45, F
@HootyTheNightOwl NO NO NO. Not you!!! His message. You’ve been great.
It may well be aggressive - he wants and needs you to fear him so that you'll submit to his control more easily. You'll do it because you fear the consequences of what he'll do if you don't. After that comes isolation and financial abuse... these two go together wonderfully because you never get to see friends and family, you're lucky if he allows you to work.
You don't need money if you never leave the house - but he might put bills in your name just because he's screwed his own credit so you have no money and these bills you can't pay because he controls every penny.
Now he's got you right where he wants you. You have no access to your family and friends and the financial aspect means that you can't escape because you don't have the means to support yourself if you run - so you are either stuck with him or forced to run away or turn to crime, drugs or prostitution to make ends meet.
I'm lucky in that I have the support of someone special to help me through this now... but the road is certainly not any easier for us because even the so called "domestic violence help" requires you to take insane amounts of risk to get away from the abuse.
If you can, it's better to not take the road that I was forced to take as the lesser of two evils since it saves you a lot of strife when you ultimately find someone that you love and start to see the true extent of the abuse that you've been living with.
You don't need money if you never leave the house - but he might put bills in your name just because he's screwed his own credit so you have no money and these bills you can't pay because he controls every penny.
Now he's got you right where he wants you. You have no access to your family and friends and the financial aspect means that you can't escape because you don't have the means to support yourself if you run - so you are either stuck with him or forced to run away or turn to crime, drugs or prostitution to make ends meet.
I'm lucky in that I have the support of someone special to help me through this now... but the road is certainly not any easier for us because even the so called "domestic violence help" requires you to take insane amounts of risk to get away from the abuse.
If you can, it's better to not take the road that I was forced to take as the lesser of two evils since it saves you a lot of strife when you ultimately find someone that you love and start to see the true extent of the abuse that you've been living with.
easterniowegin · 51-55, M
Prttylttlthng · 41-45, F
@easterniowegin Agree. Which is why I’m trying to move on; so don’t know WHY every time I start to he has this sixth sense to suck me back in.
easterniowegin · 51-55, M
@Prttylttlthng stop letting him manipulate you like that. Stop giving yourself to a man who hasnt earned you yet. 😉
Prttylttlthng · 41-45, F
@easterniowegin You’re right. That was a pretty manipulative thing of him to send. I was merely doing what i told him I was going to do (which is stop waiting around on him.)
Butterflykisses24 · 51-55, F
bijouxbroussard · F
Unfortunately, people treat you the way that you allow them to. No matter what you [b]say[/b], as long as you [b]stay[/b], the overriding message is that you’re accepting the situation. You have to decide, because he’s getting what he wants and has no incentive to change anything.
JaggedLittlePill · 46-50, F