Ladies: do you respect a weak/beta male?
Just looking for other people's thoughts and opinions on it.
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Pseudonym · 26-30, M
I came here to read the comments, interested because I don't consider myself 'alpha' by any stretch of the imagination. I'm a relatively passive person, conflict averse where possible. Although I know consciously, that it isn't always the best policy for long term betterment of my life.
The reason I employ that strategy is quite simple; I'm not a 'big' guy. I'm slim and of average height. There's an underlying threat in any social confrontation of physical violence. Normally, it is just a threat, only actionable as a last resort (thank social and state punishment for that). But if it came to it, I'd probably come off worse for wear in most cases.
That's not to say I'm a coward. I'll stand up for what is right, and I've done things in the past that guys twice my size have looked expectantly around for someone else to do. It's a different sort of courage. However, if I were physically stronger I think I'd argue my case more, feeling reassured by my strength if it ever came to blows. In fact my primary motivation for gymming it up, is to become stronger for that very reason.
In terms of respect, I am bothered if people respect me; indeed, half of those people are going to be women. But only if it's for reasons that I care about. I.e. if you respect my opinion on a subject because I've read around it, not because I'm shouting louder, then I do. Or if I'm defending a point of what is morally right, then great. Otherwise, I couldn't give a shit what you respect.
In terms of attraction. That's a whole different ball game. I don't even think women know what they're attracted to half the time. And even when they do, they usually don't want to admit it. The same applies for blokes but we're here talking about women's respect for men so...
Being 'alpha' in the way society portrays it, definitely does make you more attractive whatever objections you may have. A male's muscular, athletic body tells your primal brain the man is physically fit, probably healthy and able to defend you and potential children. Having attractive facial features, especially those related to a healthy smile, clear skin, thick and full hair, and facial symmetry tell of good genetics. Having a lot of wealth could mean he's hardworking (or if not, at least still able to provide you with material things and an easier life). Being loud in social situations says that he could be a social person, somebody who's good company (not always, but it can be a good sign). Etc etc. These are some of the traits of an alpha male from where I stand. The obvious, overt ones. Doesn't mean that that someone is a good person, or deserves respect. That takes far more time to determine.
The reason I employ that strategy is quite simple; I'm not a 'big' guy. I'm slim and of average height. There's an underlying threat in any social confrontation of physical violence. Normally, it is just a threat, only actionable as a last resort (thank social and state punishment for that). But if it came to it, I'd probably come off worse for wear in most cases.
That's not to say I'm a coward. I'll stand up for what is right, and I've done things in the past that guys twice my size have looked expectantly around for someone else to do. It's a different sort of courage. However, if I were physically stronger I think I'd argue my case more, feeling reassured by my strength if it ever came to blows. In fact my primary motivation for gymming it up, is to become stronger for that very reason.
In terms of respect, I am bothered if people respect me; indeed, half of those people are going to be women. But only if it's for reasons that I care about. I.e. if you respect my opinion on a subject because I've read around it, not because I'm shouting louder, then I do. Or if I'm defending a point of what is morally right, then great. Otherwise, I couldn't give a shit what you respect.
In terms of attraction. That's a whole different ball game. I don't even think women know what they're attracted to half the time. And even when they do, they usually don't want to admit it. The same applies for blokes but we're here talking about women's respect for men so...
Being 'alpha' in the way society portrays it, definitely does make you more attractive whatever objections you may have. A male's muscular, athletic body tells your primal brain the man is physically fit, probably healthy and able to defend you and potential children. Having attractive facial features, especially those related to a healthy smile, clear skin, thick and full hair, and facial symmetry tell of good genetics. Having a lot of wealth could mean he's hardworking (or if not, at least still able to provide you with material things and an easier life). Being loud in social situations says that he could be a social person, somebody who's good company (not always, but it can be a good sign). Etc etc. These are some of the traits of an alpha male from where I stand. The obvious, overt ones. Doesn't mean that that someone is a good person, or deserves respect. That takes far more time to determine.