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I want to kill myself.

I'm so hurt... Help me.
He came back to see me, he says he loves me. We have been on this on-and-off flirtationship for 5 years until now when he disclosed his feelings for me.
But then he feels guilty about his wife, and chose to be with her out of guilt.
She asked of him to give the last 2 weeks of his stay exclusively to her, since she knows she can't win my love for him, and he loves me is unable to love her.

I agreed to her terms and he did too.
Now he decides that maybe if we're both willing, we can start again in time to come, because he can't bring himself to even think about divorcing her. I hate him for reeling me in with false promises only to back out on his word.

I'm overwhelmed. I have mixed feelings. I don't know what to do. He and I knows we are so compatible with each other that even my mother recognises that. Like... soulmates. But he's all talk and no action. He did prove his love to me, but when it comes to the deal-breaker, he just can't. How can he even say that he truly loves me?!

I'm just at lost, I want to kill myself, or either go to the airport to send him off, and stab her to death. Isn't it crazy? I'm going nuts... Please save me. I can't hold myself together anymore.
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greenmountaingal · 70-79, F
Everyone here is right. Break the addiction and get away from this jerk.

One way to do that is to put aside your jealous temper and get in touch with his wife and ask her to meet with you at a good restaurant and buy her a good lunch. Ask her to meet with you without letting him know about it. Then tell her you want to hear what has happened from her point of view. Be kind and friendly and respectful and just listen to what she has to say. Then, if she wants to hear it, tell her what has gone on from your point of view.

Both of you will discover the huge lies he has been telling both of you. He is a manipulator who has figured out how to keep two women competing for him.

Learn the truth. Then, armed with that knowledge, break free from him. Expect the emotional withdrawal to take anywhere from weeks to months. It's a matter of waiting until your body chemistry catches up with your mind. Once the addiction is broken, you will feel so much better. Get away from this truly toxic man.

And don't look back.
SW-User
Why meet with her ? Just move on ...put it behind you ...you are not obligated to meet with her or him . ..
greenmountaingal · 70-79, F
Just a technique for discovering his lies. Sometimes it can help to learn the truth. Of course there is no need to do it if she can just plain leave.