Will my betrayal trauma carry into my new relationship?

@1dayiWILLbRICH0
[quote]you also shouldnt go through someone else’s phone. Trust me if they’re cheating one day it will come out and you’ll get small hints without going through their phone. I promise.[/quote]

😘😘 That's the way to go.. it's indecent to touch someone's phone, for a phone too is someone's [b]wife[/b] .. and it's [b]adultery[/b] to touch the wife of someone.. and the phone is a wife of females too .. for the beholder is the husband.

@in10RjFox 😂🤣😂🤣😂, says the guy who who is arguing [quote]. Love is not monogamous. [/quote] on another post.

You really should make up your mind. 🤣

@OogieBoogie[big] Looks like what I have said is gone above your roof .. [/big] and you are troubled in the way I use terminologies. Yeah.. I am a master. 😘🤪

@in10RjFox a master?
Is that why you're using large font like a child...to shout at me visually?
To look bigger to try and intimidate?
🤣😂
That's like a cat that puffs itself up in defence 😂

Look dude, believe as you wish.
The user actually uses the word anxiety.
Anxiety is not phobia, nor shock, nor panic not anything near the level of what a phobia is.

And yes, I am a little annoyed that you use terminologies wrong.

Plus the fact, that in your uneducated philosophy, that you deem it psychologically healthy to take someone's rationalised fear - and exaggerate it by calling it a phobia - which is dangerous .

- Psychology 101....dont make it worse -

Their fear isn't irrational, given realistic percentages, people do commit adultery and/or cheat on partners.
Its a known risk.

But....its worth it.
Its worth trying for .
Its worth working through emotionally so one comes out stronger, wiser and more mature emotionally.

So, maybe, before you go spruking bullshit - fact check it first.

And also, do us a favour and stop giving potentially psychologically damaging advice to emotionally vulnerable people.

Stick to analytics.
That's your forté.

@OogieBoogie 😀.. just because you are upset with my approach, does not mean everyone will. And it's an advanced world where people have to understand and consume intellectual stuff too. It's like you can advise the consumer against the harm of burger or fast food, you are asking Burger King to stop selling burgers.. 😀😀

@in10RjFox
A persons psyche isnt a hamburger.😏
And you aren't Burger King😂

All im trying to get.you to see is: we all have different strengths.
Yours is logic, gathering of statistical informarion, assessing it, breaking it down. (im rather guessing here as analytics isnt in my skill group).
But for me, understanding emotional flow is.
Intellectectual knowledge doesnt work the same.qay as emotional knowledge.
Just becuase A + B = outcome C with logic, its not the same emotionally.
Sometimes A + B can = AB or C or Z.

One not only needs to REALLY pay attention to what someone is saying, but also what they are not saying.
One needs to read the room, be gentle....respect vulnerability.
Choice of words is crucial.

You dont know their background, past experiences....possible repeated experiences, emotional trauma if any.

You cant go storming in, makin exaggerated claims and potentially doing further damage to an already compromised emotional process.

The wrong word, at the wrong time could flip someone into depression, denial or worse.

Humans arent object's. They are very complex creatures.

Be gentle.
Care.

You can be so brutal, its scary.
And i dont think you are aware of what damage you can do .

Hearts are fragile things.
They can break so easily .

So when you next advise someone whos heart feels broken....hold it as if it were the heart of a child.
Sooth it.
Dont scare it.

Take a deep breath and be gentle.

@OogieBoogie
[b]Wonderful Wonderful Wonderful [/b]
Any reason why we say things three times ? But I know.. for life is so mysterious...

Now introspect if you have ever had such an outburst in life .. honestly get back and read what all you wrote and you will be surprised to learn.. "has this and these come out of me ?" ..

My greatest finding in life is that [b]advise another to advise thyself. [/b]
And that's what I did with you.. to provoke you to find yourself..

We often think that we advice another but never realise that we only advice ourself through another...

It was a pleasure to read what you wrote after the line "Human's aren't objects" .. but as a therapist I have to do what I have to do knowing the consequence of my action... Please note that Surgical incision applies in psychology too like the material body.. and metaphorically a soul is such a body to me .. as I fully know where I am insert my knife and what I am fixing..

You are screaming to a surgeon don't cut there .. and there is so much blood.. so how do you think a surgeon would respond ?

@OogieBoogie anyway [b]I reserved the right to publish our exchange as a journal and share 50% royalty with you [/b] as no author or publisher can create such an exchange of thoughts.

It was not a joke when I said [big]I love you [/big] in my PM's a long time ago.. oops did I shout ?

But it takes time and only time knows what it does and how for it even brings people together to separate them for life and vice versa..

😘😘 Loved it all ..

@OogieBoogie [quote]You dont know their background, past experiences....possible repeated experiences, emotional trauma if any.

You cant go storming in, makin exaggerated claims and potentially doing further damage to an already compromised emotional process.

The wrong word, at the wrong time could flip someone into depression, denial or worse.

Humans arent object's. They are very complex creatures.

Be gentle.
Care.[/quote]

Simple answer from me for this is

[big] Karma [/big]

Have you ever asked yourself why and when did the need arise for someone to ask such a question in an international forum? What would they be doing before all these technologies part and parcel of life? And can you say such a thing never happened a thousand years ago?

@1dayiWILLbRICH0 how did it come up that you got his phone password? Did you ask for it or did it just come up in conversation?