Does betrayal make you feel useless?

@Abstraction Yeah true. I began that war. Do I move on? Do I wait? Was it all a lie?

@Eklipse It can be healed. It can be ok again. It can even be great again. It takes commitment from both and time. The perpetrator often underestimates how much time it takes to heal and win back trust.

@Abstraction The perpetrator in this case can't even face me which is probably what sucks the most. I'm good to walk away like nothing ever happened but I want to throw a fight anyway.

@Eklipse 'Throw a fight' is not a term I know, sorry. In my country if you 'throw' a fight you deliberately lose. You mean fight to fix it or opportunity to express your hurt?

@Abstraction An opportunity to settle scores. I at least feel I deserve that.

@Eklipse I think the opportunity to communicate is better than everything just swirling around inside. My approach would be communication rather than fight because... I don't argue in relationships, I sit and sort things together. Fights mean people just defend themselves or attack back. Communication cuts much deeper without that because they have to face what you say, not dismiss it. I'm not giving advice, I'm just telling you what I do and you aren't me. I'm just talking. :)

@Abstraction Yeah sure. I accept diff perspectives would be no point talking about it otherwise. However I got no availability to communicate or I'd have done it long ago. Waiting seems like torture.

@Eklipse I'm sure. Betrayal hits at something fundamental within us. We choose to trust because without it we can't be vulnerable. Without vulnerability two people hide and just operate roles within a relationship and often never quite feel loved because they aren't quite known. My view anyway. I like depth in a relationship. I hope you find a way to express that pain - he deserves to hear it, you deserve to express it. And I hope next time around you find what you deserve.