why do feel so let down when somoene we love decided to do the unthinkable, you cheat and dont feel remorseful about it still stating they had to do i

I read an article years ago in which the author talked about ‘mindful’ dating.

I don’t remember much of the rest of the article, but the writer emphasized the important impact of causing trauma by cheating, violence or other bad behavior. He made the point that the innocent partner’s life would for ever be changed.

I think that’s true.

Because they have gone against the social values that you were so carefully ingrained with growing up.

It's a well known fact that a child's most informative years are before the age of seven. Going against those values can only cause guilt.

Not learning those values before the age of seven can affect anyone in a negative way. Often they are unempathic as well as lack remorse.

The expectance of those values is as well ingrained before the age of seven. We expect those values to be upheld. We really don't like change. Even though life is full of changes in everything.

The easiest path is the well worn path. And forbid it if that path becomes blocked. We are no longer within what we expect. So the conflict on what to do starts.

Cheating can be self destructive. We feel let down because we expect our partners not only to us but also themselves (or idea of them anyway), so when they cheat we're caught off guard. Men and women cheat for different reasons, so it's always hard not to wonder why.

Always guard your heart. Always.

Whether male or female; you cheat, prepare for consequences. As for those who got cheated on, walk away and move on. Never return to the cheater because once a cheater, always a cheater. This is what 'entitled' people do. Then they play the victim card whenever they are being held accountable for their poor choices. Or better yet these 'entitled' people claim they can do what they want when they want and dare anyone to hold them accountable. My condolences to all who got cheated on. As for the cheaters, do not ask me for any sympathy when you lose everything.

It’s just sexual appetite, it’s not emotional feelings. Men can compartmentalise