@
Vengabus Your description you just wrote does not sound to me like Catastrophic OCD any longer but it still sounds kind of like a form of OCD because it's continuous, habitual. Ask yourself, had this been getting progressively worse over time. If you've been married quite a few years, figure out when did it start. This doesn't sound like it has anything to do with you but everything to do with him. If it's been going on a long time, Will he talk with you about it openly without a fight starting? Has there been any kind of major change in your relationship that could have escalated this behavior. It sounds from your original post that this has been going on for maybe as long as you've known him.... and maybe getting worse?
You don't need to answer me, just answer yourself those questions. If he hasn't done it all along then something might have triggered it. People often act differently when they're having an affair. The cheating puts them on edge. They know they shouldn't be doing it and they feel guilty about it but yet they don't want to stop and they can't talk about it with their spouse for fear of losing them. Sometimes they have to find an outlet and will blame the spouse for whatever reason so all this tension is held inside. It can leak out into unnecessary arguments.
Think about his other behaviors, have any of those changed? Has his schedule with work or daily life changed? These are all things you might want to ask yourself. I wouldn't think he would purposely be trying to worry you. Ihat's the case, it's him that is worried about something. Depression/Anxiety might trigger something like this maybe. Does he think he might be losing you? Men and women can get kind of squirrely thinking that.
I hope he hasn't had any violent tendencies. If he does I would hope you would get out. If you would go talk with someone about it but seems reluctant you might offer to go with him to see if that might help.
What you're going through would drive me crazy and has before. You say you know him really well (which is great) , use that caringly to try and see if he'll open up to you or someone else.
Does he have a reason he might be worried about getting tangled up with the police? Always with the police just sounds like playing paranoia, but why? Doesn't make sense. Has he tried to keep you from seeing friends or family? Keep you all to himself? That would be a red flag.
