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Should I give up?

I'm just going to drop the ball on this and say it... I love my boyfriend, but he's addicted to work. He is 46 and has been married before. So he's not super into the idea of long-term commitment anymore. I think he doesnt believe it's achievable forever.

I've never been married and I am 32. I hope to be some day though. I love communication and touch, and I need to see my partner at least 1x/week. He can go weeks without talking or seeing me, but he still loves me. He just gets consumed in work.

I tried talking to him about this last night, since it's been about a month since we've seen each other in person last. When we do see each other in person, it's magic, but I need the continued long distance communication to keep the flame burning. The longer we go without talking the more anxious I become in the relationship and unsure of how he feels.

So anyways, I brought this up to him last night and asked him what the minimum and maximum time he would ideally like to have together. He asked me and i answered, then I asked it back. In response he said, "This is boring. I dont want to talk about it." I explained that I dont feel good when we rarely see each other but if there was some limit/standard/expectation it would make me feel more secure in the relationship. He said "That's too mechanical." I continued to try to explain, but it seemed like he was getting bothered by the idea of talking about it.

We currently see each other in person about 1x/month. We live a 5 hour drive from each other and it's a 45 min flight.

It started out as a phone call, then went to text. Here are the messages from that conversation.

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elafina · 36-40, F
Oh girl...oh oh oh. I mean.. you can definitely do better dear. He sounds like an egotistical, depressed and dark type of person who wants you but only in his own terms. That's not true love. Step back, do yourself a favour and create space in your life away from him, the situation sounds truly devastating for your well being. Goodbye him, the sooner the better.
He needs help actually but don't fall for it, you can't help him. All the best...
JimboSaturn · 51-55, M
@elafina Agreed, he is mean.