How do I deal with my mother in-law?

I realize that I may be asking a very vague question here, considering the variety of issues that women have with their mothers in law... but at the same time, I think it all stems from the same place... the refusal of a mother to stop interfering in the life of her child... She keeps interfering in our lives and at the moment it is affecting our relationship.
I fear I may always be on the losing side of this battle, because I am not willing to stoop to the same levels of manipulation that she does. It's all too easy for her to start crying and play on his emotions, which she does, and he is left giving up more and more ground. I, on the other hand, am not willing to emotionally manipulate or silence him - meaning that every time concessions are made, they are in her favor.
At this point I am afraid of losing him or even losing myself due to constantly having to give ground. How do I deal with this situation? I really don't know anymore

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Fairydust · F

Can you ask him to speak to her, just stop seeing them as much, reduce contact. I did and felt great.

Lullacus · 31-35, F

@Fairydust I spoke to him, and he shares many of my frustrations, but the moment she starts crying... he just gives in. She knows how to manipulate him and does so quite liberally. He cannot speak to her, because she doesn't allow him a chance to speak. She talks over him and refuses to see things from his perspective, because all that matters is how she feels about it.
We don't see them as much anymore, thus she has resorted to constantly phoning and messaging him. When he does not reply, she gets the rest of the family to hound him until he does

ilikeitlikethat23 · 61-69, M

@Lullacus cut them off completely for 30 days don't answer their calls or refuse to discuss his relationship with his mother with anyone else in the family just hang up. He's got to be a man someday, today is as good a day as any.

Lullacus · 31-35, F

@ilikeitlikethat23 I have suggested this option, but he insists that he needs to deal with it in his own way... and so far, I am letting him. I am afraid that he might end up resenting me if I had to push for cutting contact.

Fairydust · F

@Lullacus he needs to see she has an unhealthy hold over him. I feel for you. 😞 I agree with keepitsimple.