I Find Honesty and Trust Very Important In Any Relationship

Wow, I honestly didn't expect much of a reaction to this so I wanted to take a minute to thank everyone who is commenting - it really helps a lot, and I really appreciate people taking time to say something. I've been feeling really stupid for getting this far into this relationship, so it's nice that others can help me not be so hard on myself about this. Thank you again.

Without trust, you can't trust others either, you will grow to become a paranoid person and think everyone's tricking you. Plus, it's much easier to just straight up tell the truth. I used to be a pathological liar until I was 18, but then, a really screwed up event changed my life completely on this. I made a fake assumption and told it as if it will happen, and the people who counted on this felt betrayed, and since then I took a vow never to lie. I've never felt better, I just zap through the thoughts as I think them and I don't have to care. I'm too lazy to lie nowadays.

But yeah, I completely agree with you that honesty does matter, and this is a sneaky low blow. "She won't accept me having kids so I'll just wait for her to grow compassion and tell her". But he does feel guilt deep down for this, he thinks that he started off as a liar, him changing his perspective will result in you mocking him and acting like you know better, hence why he could probably continue if nothing else. But he knows he's wrong. He does.

Edit: the above statement is just an example. But yeah, like I said, he knows he did wrong. But he thinks it's too late to go back.

I am so sorry that he has done that to you.

That's awful. I'm sorry you're going through such a difficult time.

Oooft that's a real difficult one

Oh my loard. Sorry to hear that. So he has been leading a double life or it is past relationship resurfacing?

I'm so sorry. That must be so hard, and I'm afraid there won't be any easy answers. :( But in the end, you have to do what's best for you. I feel bad for those kids too, but I don't know how much you can really do for them when their father is the one setting a bad example. I suppose you may be able to keep in touch with them, depending on how old they are, but that might not be doable either, if you decide that you're done with him.

still you don't know what else he lied about.

It isn't just him sleeping with another, it is far was than that. Because he has broken the mutual trust and respect couple share. Innate experienced that with my now ex wife ,but splitting up and divorce is not something to do lightly. Why should the innocent party ,in this case you suffer for it. I do not have the answer I am afraid but you have my support

Well does he love his kids maybe he will let you take them well shared custody?