Would there be a bigger benefit to the children to?

"Please don't judge" -the sunisout -I must say this made me laugh considering your tone dead attack on other people's choices all because you got a bad step parent as a child. News flash : this isn't all about you. Children can also have positive experiences with step parents or survive quite happily when the parents don't repartner. You can't make your wife do anything. If you supported her to get a job and cut down on her drinking -then great. But you didn't do that -she did. Unfortunately you're still not happy and have to convince yourself that it is "strong" and "right" to stay. Great. Whatever works. The problem is when you project from this that the choices of other people -who you don't know -are weak and wrong....because they differ from the choices you've made