Starting to doubt my choice...

He was abusive, no doubt, but they're 99, maybe that's how marriage is for 99 year olds. Maybe they just abuse each other. Maybe I intervened and made it worse. Maybe I broke apart a couple that loved each other in a way 99 year olds do. They're from a different time. What if it wasn't my place?

Is it better to be hurt by someone or to hurt because you miss them?

I feel bad. Really really bad.

If I said nothing they would of hurt each other. He was very cruel to her. Her family wouldn't even visit her because of him.

But maybe that's what she wanted? But what does her dementia mind want and should she get it if her safety is at risk?

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OogieBoogie · F

Tough situation.

Im sure you have a 'duty of care' protocol you must follow?

If you think what he did went against best care practices for her....then stand by it.

Just because they are used to a dysfunctional dynamic, doesnt mean you have to be exposed to it.

You have the duty to practice proper care, to expected standards.